A fantastic group of people will be attending the Eating Peace Retreat January 19-22, right here at a lovely private lodge near my little cottage in Seattle. I’d love you to join us. People are traveling from every corner of the US so far, literally New York, West Virginia, California and of course up here in the Pacific Northwest. For travelers, there are still queen sized mattresses we can set up for you in the loft (no private rooms left, although someone may be willing/interested in sharing).
The most important part of the retreat….if I could say there is a MOST important….
….is being with yourself compassionately.
Like the way you are with other people.
You’ll slow down, we’ll eat together, write together, question thoughts together, have an experience of art and movement together. We’re in session daily from 9:30 am until 9:00 pm. No matter how far down the road to overweight, underweight, crazy eating or simple unhappiness about food…..you will be welcomed with open arms.
Enroll here. Space for 4 more. As mentioned in the Eating Peace Masterclass, included in this retreat registration is a one-on-one session to use any time in 2017 whether in person or online.
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Have you ever noticed how your thoughts seem to direct your behavior (including eating, obviously).
And yet, you don’t have to DO what your thoughts say.
You might get wound up full of cravings and compulsions and reaching and the agony of urges to stuff yourself with food.
It seems like that Voice that says GO GO GO is nasty, unconcerned about your peace or your freedom, busy, rude, critical of you. That Voice suggests that you….eat. It almost demands you eat, if you have a craving for food. As if there’s no other option.
But there is another option.
You actually take this other option all the time.
It’s called Not Listening To Or Doing What Your Mind Says.
It’s not the King of everything (it might think so, but it really isn’t).
Based on the Tao Te Ching, here’s a way to work with the mind that’s yelling at you to eat: tap into what is NOT your thoughts.
Scared to go inside this cave? It could be your only way to peace…..At least it was for me.
Several people who couldn’t attend the new Living Turnaround group that started yesterday wrote to me this past weekend and asked….
….I want to know how to investigate a situation so I can find out how to make the lasting changes I always want to make, but never seem to find!
Can you point me in the right direction with Living Turnarounds and how to do them or find them?
Where do I begin?
Some shared with me they feel like they have a ton of places they’d like things to be different. They wished THEY were different, most of all.
You might notice the same.
Where do you wish things were different? Relationship status, body, aging, money, house, career, service to others.
Sometimes, you may notice….there’s something imperfect and improvable about everything you consider!
But as I asked some of the amazing people who came yesterday in person to the group….
….first, you begin by making a short list, or scanning in your mind what you wish was different….
….whether you feel slightly uncomfortable, just a wee bit disappointed, or really upset.
You may notice, something rises to the top asking to be seen.
Yes, THAT situation with “x”. I really wish it were otherwise.
Now, instead of going straight to a Judge Your Neighbor worksheet, consider the following question and journal about it and get ready to do Step #1 in understanding YOU.
Observing yourself, without so much dreadful internal screaming about what’s wrong with you.
Seriously. Don’t jump to how awful you are so fast.
It’s a diversion.
OK? Agreed?
Studying yourself and contemplating some important questions come out of work and research I’ve gathered for many years on desire, goals, and action-taking….how these happen in life, how they don’t.
Some of this work comes from extended research in the field of human motivation, behavior and transformation ever since I studied it in graduate school in the late 1990s.
This was before I ever heard of The Work….but the research and study of human behavior is oh so connected to questioning your stressful beliefs.
Because what do experts say, quite often?
Action is about what people are thinking, what’s in the mind, that drives their behavior.
To “live” a turnaround and experience deep or permanent change is about first, identifying the underlying beliefs that create fear, lack of ease, inaction, or action you don’t really want (like overeating, my old favorite personal example).
So, follow along with me here.
Let’s say you want to be in better shape physically, or as I used to want all the time, let’s say you want peace with food and eating.
Here’s the first question you want to keep in mind, before racing to The Work:
What do you do, how do you behave, what actions do you take….that crushes or destroys this state of peace you so desire?
As in, you ain’t gonna get that thing you want if you keep doing “x”.
For example, long ago when I suffered from binge-eating, I might have said “I don’t ever experience eating peace because…..twice a week I binge-eat from one end of the continent to the other without stopping to breathe for one second”.
Let’s say you’re having concerns with lack of money, and you feel like money’s always been a problem, or has been for a really long time. (Some of the members of the Living Turnaround group mentioned this…..OK, all of them).
What do you do, in that case, that keeps you from stability with money?
Make a list. Really answer the question thoroughly. Be specific. Sometimes, you even have to observe yourself for a week (or longer) and watch what you do and catch all the moments, because it’s easy to forget or be unaware.
Academics and researchers might calls this collecting the data.
You’re being like a scientist with yourself, watching, looking, taking notes. Don’t let shame or guilt come in and slam the door on this looking!! (I had that happen all the time around eating issues and was very secretive for fear of other peoples’ judgment).
So long ago, when I was getting help for this weird binge-eating behavior I seemed to live with….I studied what was going on during those binges. I wrote down what was happening. I wrote down what I had experienced earlier, before the urge to binge began. What was my state of hunger physically? Who did I encounter? What was I thinking?
Then…you can answer this next interesting question:
What’s the worst that could happen if you did the OPPOSITE of this behavior or activity? What would bother you about doing this? What’s the danger lurking for you, when you think about not doing this activity you’ve been doing–maybe for years?
So, in my example (lacking eating peace) I would wonder by writing in my journal about why, if I stopped binge-eating, I might find this threatening? What would disturb me about stopping this behavior?
I know.
If you had asked me without explaining that something important is going on that prevents normal behavior with food, or if you asked me what I would have been afraid of if I stopped binge-eating, I might not have been able to think of one single answer.
I might have even said….WHAT??! Are you crazy? It would be GREAT to no longer have cravings and then stuff myself, it’s what I always wanted….to STOP suffering from an eating disorder.
But just open your mind a little and give this a minute.
What if you are not ridiculous, and what if there isn’t anything wrong with you?
What if your mind is a genius at making sure you avoid, at all costs, what could really be emotionally, physically, or spiritually painful?
What if this idea of no longer having your actions (in my case “binge-eating”) available to you made you raw, exposed, nervous…..for any reason whatsoever?
What kind of young woman would be afraid of stopping binge-eating behavior?
As it turned out, there were several reasons why I would be afraid to stop binge-eating.
One was, because in between binges, I was always thinking I should be starving myself. I DID starve myself. I used lots of willpower to push really hard in athletics.
I was also terrified to speak of my true inner feelings (we don’t do that in this family) or to show I felt upset about anything.
So, feeling super upset, sad, afraid started having a wild condensed response to it….all piled and smashed up in a ball of unexpressed energy inside, and it exploded out with binge-eating (and purging, for me).
Now my behavior was very extreme.
This can be done with much more quiet and mild behaviors. You don’t have to be a crazed addicted-acting person to study yourself (some of us need things to be extreme or super obvious, apparently).
If you have a mild case of doing something you wish you wouldn’t….or NOT doing something you wish you would….
….really consider very, very deeply what you might be afraid of, if you stopped this uncomfortable behavior, or if you started doing the thing you wish you’d do.
What is it about the ACTION or NON-ACTION itself you want to learn from?
It’s your teacher.
Usually, the normal way to address human behavior that needs “correction” is to fix it ASAP. Get a diet, get an exercise plan, mark your calendar, force yourself to “do” it, ignore the fears.
As I said, several people in the Living Turnarounds group mentioned trouble with money.
Been there.
You can do this around money and your relationship to it. Notice if you feel you MUST have it, you need it to survive, you grab for it, you store it.
Or, maybe you stay really foggy with it. You have no idea how much is in your bank account, you write checks you’re not sure will clear, you borrow and owe. Some part of you doesn’t like seeing how much you actually have (hint: it’s dangerous).
What does this behavior mean about the world, about you, about people you’ve known or encountered?
Study your fears.
I really hated (at first) seeing what I was most afraid of in my late teens and early twenties.
They were thoughts like….I can’t make it on my own, but I should. People are critical (“people” being parents mostly). I have nothing to offer. I can’t do it perfectly (so why bother trying). People don’t really care about the honest me. You can’t say what you really think or feel (people get hurt). If thin, people will love respect me. If I’m not in great physical condition, people could criticize me. Food is the only pleasure I have. Food is easy to find everywhere, and comforting. I love eating forbidden foods, no one tells me what to do for once. When I’m eating, I don’t have to think about what I “should” be accomplishing, I don’t have to push myself, I can finally quit trying to be perfect every second of the day.
How could it be helping you to do that activity you notice you criticize yourself for doing? How could it be helping you to NOT do that activity you wish you’d do?
This is a huge topic, and there are ways to break it down slowly, carefully, one step at a time….
….but I say, run with it.
Wonder what you’re afraid of. Ask the powerful question Byron Katie asks “what’s the WORST that could happen?”
Keep a “thought journal”. (If you’ve been on retreat with me, especially at Breitenbush, I always hand out thought catchers to carry around with you–little notebooks to write down your stressful thoughts).
Who would you be without your story?
You’d be living your turnarounds.
“A man that flies from his fear may find that he has only taken a short cut to meet it.” ~ J.R.R. Tolkien
“The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek.” ~ Joseph Campbell
And the best news of all?
The cave, the fear, will follow you until you enter it or take a look at it. You don’t even have to worry about avoiding it endlessly, or how you’re going to address it. It’s probably not up to you, anyway.
I’m thrilled today to offer, for a third time, the MasterClass on our human barriers to doing The Work (I walk through ten of them I’ve identified)….and what helps to dissolve them. We get underway at 2:00 pm Pacific Time and will be going for a minimum of 2 hours.
What I know about doing something many times is, you get better and better at it, naturally. You learn through doing it.
This applies to doing The Work, too.
But we sure do feel lousy when we look at ourselves and have the thought “you’re doing a horrible job” or “you made a mistake” or “what a dummy!”
Yikes, that self-flogging is hard to bear, and yet very common.
Is your worst enemy……you? Find out what you’re really afraid of.
Just the other day, in the Summer Camp call, someone had a worksheet on The Work itself.
I was so moved by the honesty and the thoughts about this “thing” called “Doing The Work” and then this other entity called “me”, noticing how the “me” in question is a Big Fat Mess….
….and “The Work” needs to fix it. ASAP.
Problem is, when you really believe this is true, the BFM (Big Fat Mess) is attacked. It must be stopped.
We’re at war!
We feel the need to do The Work, or many other modalities that tend to invite and result in powerful change, because of one single basic deep assumption:
What I Am Is Not Good Enough.
What I am is not working, not succeeding, mediocre, imperfect, a procrastinator, a mistake-maker, poor at decisions, basically and inherently Less Than.
Ouch.
It’s hard to question all the thoughts you identify that are directed at YOU, this entity with so many problems, because part of you can’t see the underlying assumption that hurts so much and lies beneath everything and every strategy to fix it.What is happening isn’t good. I can make it change.
Double Ouch.
So what if for just a second, you stopped trying to fix yourself and your BFM (Big Fat Mess) ways……..and you directed your attention to what’s happening that hurts or feels very frightening?
If you think you’re a dork at making money, how about looking at money….instead of condemning yourself and beating yourself to a pulp trying to get yourself to pursue more money all the time?
If you think you’re horrible at love and relationships….how about looking at those relationships and wondering why you want them, what they give you, what you believe is necessary about them or necessary about getting them away from you, so you can be happy?
If you think you’re a ridiculous parent….how about looking at your kids and how they behave that suddenly has you acting like an eight year old yourself, and then feeling ashamed of it?
If you think you’re a terrible employee….how about you look at your boss, or co-worker, or the place you work and seeing what annoys you or frightens you about it that rubs you the wrong way?
If you think you’re an addict….how about you look at your terror, the times you felt traumatized, the encounters that made you feel deeply upset, maybe from the distant past?
The attack at the self often comes right on the heels of seeing a situation and thinking “This can’t be so, I can’t take this, this is failure, I’m afraid of what’s happening!”
All I know is, I have found it far more powerful to stop looking at improving myself, which is really Step 2 that the speedy mind comes up with anyway, and go for the jugular.The jugular, the most important vein, the source of nourishment and life to those thoughts about “me” and what a terrible person I am.
This is the situation I see around me, the condition of life I’m living in, the contact I have with reality….and how upset and frightened I am by it.Money, Time, People, Change, Earthquakes, Physical Injuries.
If they scare me, then I’ll work on myself forever trying to make it so I can be resilient, amazing, tough, brilliant, successful and a master of them all!
And…..dare I say it…..Rule The World!
(Little joke. My former husband who is hilarious says it with a British accent, which you should probably try, too, wringing your hands together like a mad scientist).
Isn’t that the ultimate goal, even if you have wonderful, favorable, morally beautiful goals like “enlightenment”……..you’re trying to get yourself to be different, better, more improved, beyond human?It’s gonna hurt.
Why?
Because you ARE HUMAN if you’re reading this. At least I’m pretty sure you are in the way I mean it.
And what is a human?
An incredible, genius life-force of powerful creative, spacious, aware energy turned “on” for “x” amount of years on this planet by something we-know-not-what but we call it Source, God, Universe, Reality, Life, Mystery.What else is human?
Making really goofy mistakes, having big emotions and crying, feeling fear, learning about people, wailing and suffering, doing dingy things, loving, forgetting stuff, dying, believing thoughts, hurting other people, sleeping, waking up, going to war, illness, going on adventures, feeling joy, grabbing, breaking apart, sharing, coming home.In the midst of all this….a most incredible mind built for inquiring into meaning, built for wondering.
A mind somehow here to help us feel what it’s like when we let all parts of humanness dance, dance and dance.A mind capable of identifying and questioning fearful thoughts, and unraveling their power, one questioned thought at a time.
“Truth is not lacking or held in abeyance for some later date; it is given in full measure, and abundantly so. Do not be afraid of what appears to be chaos or dissolution–embrace the full measure of your life at any cost. Bare your heart to the Unknown and never look back. What you are stands content, invisible, and everlasting. All means have been provided for our endless folly to split open into eternal delight.” ~ Adyashanti
If you’d like to join the amazing inner adventure of personal inquiry practice, Year of Inquiry early bird closes Friday, and our first group telecall is Tuesday, September 8th.
The curriculum? Your life. All the most common topics we humans tend to experience as painful. You know what stresses you out. This is the scaffolding that allows you to question it. Read all about it here.
Have you often wondered why you’re eating, or why you ate the food you ate, or why you ate the way you ate?
If you’ve experienced compulsion with food, you’ve certainly wondered these things many times.
The answer to this question, for me, has really become quite simple.
The reason I’m eating (or doing anything compulsive that I really don’t want to do, or isn’t healthy for me) is because I am AFRAID!
I’ve felt threatened by something.
I’m nervous.
This might have happened many years ago, or very recently.
But my view of a relationship, a task, a request, an activity, a dynamic about life and the world….
….is fearful.
Here’s an amazing question to ask that can really help uncover the truth of what you’re thinking and believing when you feel like doing something (in this case eating).
Most of us who eat or do compulsive things for emotional reasons are trying very hard to adapt to difficult situations.
Maybe there’s a particular experience you feel really, really vulnerable about.
Like….please, I don’t ever want this to happen.
For me, one of my vulnerable spots was that I don’t want to be rejected. I don’t someone to feel complete lack of forgiveness towards me. I don’t want to have no recourse, or be unable to make it up to them, if I do something “wrong”.
Very, very stressful.
It went back a long, long way into my history.
It felt like a core, gut feeling I had for my entire life.
If you give yourself the attention, the care, the compassion to look at your own places of vulnerability….
….maybe even the “special” two or three you repeat over and over….
….you may find something amazing happen.
You stop craving food. You stop feeling so compulsive.
Ask this one question when you feel like overeating, or doing something to soothe yourself emotionally that isn’t really that good for you (drinking, smoking, hooking up, spending).
I’m off to the wild, lush and incredibly nurturing Breitenbush Hotsprings for our sold-out retreat doing The Work of Byron Katie for 4 days.
Breitenbush is deep in the Cascade Mountain Range. Snowed in during winter. Old huge trees and stunning air. Tucked away. A true magical retreat center.
who would you be without the internet?
But it’s kind of weird having no internet connection, or cell phone service. Nada. Zip. Zero. Even if you hike waaaaaay up to Devil’s Peak during lunch break and take your cell phone with you, just in case there’s a signal up there.
Not that I’ve ever thought of that or anything.
OK! OK! I know you love No Internet and that all the cool detached people can give it up in 2 seconds.
It IS kinda weird feeling so sure I might miss something.
How did that happen? I used to have no phone and no internet. Like, for several decades of my life. Perfectly happy. No concern.
I don’t think I ever said, like some people did….”I wish I could call so-n-so right now on a special sci-fi device” and have a dream vision of a future when this might happen.
Yet now….there’s a weird sense of concern about how long to go before getting in a car to drive to cell service to check emails.
I admit it.
I have a program to run, though! Stop calling me an internet addict! People are signing up for Summer Camp for The Mind on July 5th and Being With Byron Katie on July 9th. I can’t miss their requests and registrations!
This is IMPORTANT.
And who would I be without the belief I have to check my emails?
Now….really.
It’s not that bad.
We don’t need to do The Work on THAT, it’s not really that stressful.
But.
Visions of myself at last December’s silent retreat with Adyashanti. I snuck my phone out of my room, walked off campus far away from where someone might see me, and turned it on, holding it in my pocket.
I pressed the circle-spinning button to update emails. I could hardly wait for them to load.
Then the quick thumb movement of scrolling. Delete. Delete. Delete. Ooooh, this is an important one. Oh gosh. Must call that person back. OK, just one call.
I look around. Look left. Look right. Scan for people who might see me. I imagine the teacher or other leaders walking by. What if someone comes down this same trail?
Later in the meditation hall, someone jokes that there are probably some people here, always are, who can’t even stand to go without checking their emails, they’re so uncomfortable with silence.
Drat.
What IS going on, with this strange compulsive concern to stay connected, to check emails, to catch up, to delete, to not let the Inbox get too long, to stay on top of it?
I have friends who are very critical of internet contact. They don’t go on Facebook. They put their phones away when out. They make fun of people holding their mugs in one hand, phone in the other.
I’m sometimes one of those people.
Who would I really be without the thought I need to check emails, or have an internet connection, in those times I think I need to (there are plenty of times I don’t, FYI, just in case you think I have a problem–heh heh)?
Sitting in the empty space of *here*.
I don’t always like it.
And yet only if I struggle, or fight, or argue with the silence.
As I relax with silence, I always notice I’m almost afraid of it at first, in these kinds of moments when I haven’t wanted to sink into it. Like there’s a tightening before the full rest. Grabbing on to something solid.
Like some part of me still wants to yell….NO! Not Wild Mysterious Nothingness! NO! Not Empty Brilliant Stillness!
(Have you ever seen the Monty Python skit where a comfy chair is the punishment against a crime? NO! Not the Comfy Chair! NO! NO!)
Who or what would you be without the belief the empty, silent, mysterious, brilliant, wild nothingness is…..DANGEROUS?
Turning it all around:
I don’t need to check emails. I don’t need to find out what’s happening on the internet. I need to check my thinking. I need to check my own connection to the world wide web through this life force that needs no internet (not that there’s anything wrong with internet). I need to connect with myself. I need to connect with absolute silence. I need to relax. I need to connect with Reality, with my thoughts, with what is NOT thinking.
Ahhhhh.
“Compassion is but another word for the refusal to suffer for imaginary reasons.” ~ Nisargadatta Mahara
Much love,
Grace
P.S. Because someone is switching their place AND their friend’s accommodations, all three bedrooms are available during Being With Byron Katie silent retreat ($50 per night). Can’t wait to be with you all.
Tired of the suffering cycle? Nothing left to try…except Inquiry.
Today I can’t wait to be at East West Bookstore in Seattle doing a little mini 3 hour workshop on eating, body image and our relationship to food…..and how to enter peace instead of war.
Doing The Work is of course my favorite tool and method of inquiry for working with stressful beliefs, and naturally inquiry is what we’ll be doing in the workshop.
HOWEVER.
When it comes to addiction, fear, compulsive behavior of any kind….
….when we’re doing things we hate ourselves for later, feeling needy, feeling upset, feeling angry, feeling like we want to escape or attack (the perfect pain points for addictive or compulsive behavior)….
….then it’s often hard to find WHAT it is you’re troubled by?
What would make me troubled enough to overeat when I don’t really want to, or smoke, or drink, or start house-cleaning, or surf the internet, or try to find someone to hook up with?
The thing is, moving into your compulsive favorite thing to do, if you have one (most people do, some are more destructive than others) is a REACTION to a belief you’re thinking.
You’ve already bought the belief.
You already assume it’s true, and it’s frightening, aggravating, infuriating, and it feels hopeless.
So you do the behavior instead (in my case, I ate, and sometimes drank or smoked cigarettes or over-exercised).
It kind of works for a little bit, when you’re hunting down the substance and caught in the energy of your compulsive pattern.
When I went into the addictive behavior, I would not be aware any more of what was bothering me, and instead, I’d be thinking about eating, the food I would buy, the taste, smell and feeling of it as I devoured it. The anticipation was all-consuming and overwhelming. It was mesmerizing. Obsessive. Nothing else existed hardly, except getting my fix.
With such a wild energy taking over, the energy we’re calling “addictive”, it is actually a bit tricky and difficult to put on the brakes and see what’s hidden.
Why?
Because what’s hidden is SO PAINFUL.
I’d rather not take a look at it. Do I have to? Can’t I just eat instead? Or get stoned? Or run 10 miles and beat my body into a pulp of exhaustion? Or have sex in a bathroom with a stranger?
You can. I did.
But it wasn’t ultimately satisfying. It was shameful, embarrassing, I felt horrible later, and it kept me on the cycle I refer to as CRIME – GUILT – PUNISHMENT.
You committed a crime, you’re guilty, you must be punished. You feel horrible and gross, you vow never to do it again, and then….
….the background underground haunted old pain starts to wake up, since you’re not busy hating yourself as much, and it starts to get louder.
Sooner or later, when it gets too loud to tolerate, you need to do the thing again, the thing that helps you forget about it.
Let me tell you, I am so happy not to be in that severe cycle anymore I kiss the ground with gratitude.
It doesn’t mean I don’t do it in smaller, much more subtle doses. For example, I’ve noticed a tendency to compulsively try to be pleasing to people so they’ll relax, calm down, like me, or become safer for me. This compulsion to be in communication with others in a pleasing way shows up sometimes by me withholding what I really want, or not saying what’s really true. (We’ll talk about that another day).
Here’s what’s important for stopping a cycle of compulsive thinking, and then compulsive acting, that zips you away from seeing what you ultimately really WANT to see, even if it’s painful.
First, decide you want to see what’s going on, what’s hidden. Part of you already DOES want to see it….encourage that part.
Then, notice these two options.
Old Way, Defensive Way, Conditioned Way (called “Believing Your Thoughts”):
You feel something uncomfortable. It’s stressful.
You feel scared you did something wrong, or you’re being rejected or you’re a bad person.
You quick move to the other person or people involved.They’re doing it wrong….not just you. They might be the primary ones to blame.
Run away from those people, they’re bad, OR, Fight those people, they’re bad.
Deal with your anxiety, or the sense you’ve had a close call with something frightening by _____ (fill in the blank with your favorite compulsion: eat, drink, sex, smoke, read, internet, spend)
Forget about it all for awhile. Relief. Oblivion.
New Way, Loving Way, Freedom Way (called “Questioning Your Thoughts”):
You feel something. It’s stressful.
You feel scared you’re doing something wrong, or you’re being rejected, or you’re a bad person—or that someone else is.
Pause. Write down your thoughts. What’s disturbing you?
Do The Work and answer the four questions, innquiring about yourself with curiosity and self-care, and compassion.
Notice that you’re OK without doing anything. See if you can BE. Use your speedy fast mind and your imagination to wonder what it would be like without your story? What if you’re not seeing the whole picture, or the true picture?
Clearly see options for yourself you didn’t see before. Notice how dealing with your internal world is what you always wanted, not to run away from it. Notice how brilliant you’ve been so far with your compulsions, and now, you’re becoming aware of a more expansive view. You are safe.
When you’re finished moving through the steps in the old way, the old pattern, it’s just a matter of time until you DO your compulsive behavior again.
When you’re finished moving through the steps in the new, alternative way, you often take action. You go back to the person you’re most afraid of, and ask them any questions perhaps. You say “no” or you say “yes” with much greater clarity. You no longer feel confusion. You ask for what you need more directly. You get help.
Which way seems like the better one, the more interesting way, the more fun way?
I really had no other option if I wanted to stay alive, than to take the second road, even though part of me wanted to Not Look and thought it was easier following the first road.
It wasn’t.
It was hell.
Who would you be with inquiry, instead of believing your stressful stories?
Caring far more about my thinking, than what I’m eating or not eating, doing or not doing.
“You’re either believing your thoughts, or you’re questioning them.There’s no other choice.” ~ Byron Katie
In the Eating Peace Core Teleclass, we explore how the mind takes over our experience of eating and our relationship to food becomes eating war, not eating peace.
But when you travel and leave home or are faced with something different and unusual with eating, anxiety and war-like thoughts might become even MORE difficult.
When you leave home, or change something familiar….even going out to eat at a new restaurant or attending a meal at someone’s home….
….many people with eating concerns think “Oh no, what will they serve? What will I eat? Will it be OK? I might overeat! I might not get enough! I’ll probably gain weight!” and on and ond with fearful anxious thoughts.
First, take a deep breath.
(What I always love to call the “first course” of any meal….a deep breath).
Then, do this (watch the video). Nothing else required.
If you’re ready to join the next Eating Peace Core teleclass, the next one is 8 weeks (instead of 6) and we’ll meet on Mondays 5:30-7:00 pm Pacific time starting May 9th. (Yes, you can listen to the recordings if you can’t make it live….and I will also offer this course on a morning hour in the future as well Pacific Time if this works better with your schedule).
Module One: (weeks one and two) Underlying Beliefs that fuel eating off-balance and the Food Plan. Should you follow a food plan, or not? I’ll share when it’s a good idea, and when not. I’ll also share the most common underlying beliefs I’ve found that create eating havoc. You’ll send me your peaceful food plan and I’ll share mine with you.
Module Two: (weeks three and four) Judging Bodies. What are your thoughts about how you should look, or what those other people look like? What do you think of other perfect bodies? We’ll explore why we
Module Three: (weeks five and six) Who Taught You? Here we look at what we innocently learned from those around us, whether family of origin or society or both. We learn to disconnect our actions from what we thought was “truth” about eating.
Module Four: (weeks seven and eight) Peace Beyond Beliefs. We look even deeper at the underlying beliefs, including what we’re thinking there’s Not Enough or Too Much of in our lives that isn’t food.
If you’d like to come along on this journey, the core eating peace teleclass is a wonderful way to look closely at your relationship with food and what thoughts and feelings take you away from the natural peace within.
All you need to join the course is a phone, or skype, or any way to dial the number or connect to the event via computer. The course is audio only (not video). We will have only a small handful of people so I can give you personal attention on this journey.
