Without your horror story, what do you notice right now?

I’m sitting in such gratitude and delight in the power of people collecting together to investigate truth, suffering, love and being human here on planet earth.

Yesterday we had the first group of inquirers gathering for an 8 month adventure of meeting to do The Work.

(We’re full now, but I’ll do it again next year).

The mind, and the feelings following all the thoughts the mind produces, are magnificent.

But on a bad day….

…..it feels like it’s NOT so good that this mind is so magnificent.

It’s overwhelming.

You feel very much alone, and therefore lonely.

Kind of like this lifetime trek, especially with this mind, is never-ending and something always comes along to trip you up somehow.

Not feeling good seems super difficult, and drives people to seek relief.

Somewhere.

Anywhere.

Trouble is, sometimes there is relief, and sometimes not so much.

Even mentors or teachers, or methodologies, or practices, or books, or teachings we all agree are incredibly powerful and supportive….

….don’t always “work”.

Or sometimes, they work for awhile–we feel better temporarily.

Then, we just want to get back to that good-feeling place but we’re waving our arms around like a beetle turned upside down.

A few years ago, when sitting quietly listening to someone else do The Work on a situation that brought me to tears, I noticed a very persistent and painful underlying belief pop into my head.

This man had been responsible for killing a child by accident.

Life is full of suffering.

Its sooooooo sad.

I don’t like these stories, these terrible things that happen in peoples’ lives!

Horrible accidents, war, trauma, death, disease, starvation, depression, loneliness, being trapped or stuck emotionally.

I asked God (you can call it something else, call it Reality or The Force–that mysterious energy I have no idea how to define)….

…..what’s up with All This?

I asked this question as I heard the destruction, and pain, and the guilt this man expressed while doing The Work.

Flashes of many pictures came through my head. It felt like my heart would break.

People I personally knew who were currently suffering, people in the room I was sitting in, all of whom were there to understand better their difficult feelings about life, and how to become free of the negative, fearful, agonizing thoughts about what happens here.

Why is it so hard? I asked, feeling so desperately sad.

And bam, I realized I had a huge deep-seated base-level belief about being human.

It’s hard.

Bad things happen here.

Just listen to the news!

We wouldn’t be doing The Work, or in meditation retreats, or doing the things we all do, if life were easy, would we? Any of us?

But I felt the awareness of self-inquiry begin then to work on that thought, that deep belief, like a ping-pong bouncing and banging off edges everywhere.

Hard–easy–wanting it to be harder occasionally–wanting it to be easier (almost always, can’t this be easier)–harder–easier?

Too hard, too easy, not hard enough, not easy enough.

Well….let’s take a look at this belief.

Is it true that life is hard?

 

You’re seriously asking this question?!?

Of course it’s hard!

Did you hear what I heard? Have you seen what I’ve seen?

But wait.

Let’s slow down and wonder about this statement, this thing we’re calling “life” and how we conclude it’s hard.

Life is hard.

What is meant by that?

Usually, thoughts like I already mentioned….war, brutality, fear, death.

But is life, itself, hard (even if those things take place inside of life)?

Is it True?

Wait for it.

My answer is “no”.

I wound up here, alive, it turns out.

I didn’t invent life, or create this life. I was given it whether I like it or not.

It…..happened.

Life actually came first, not my thoughts about it, or my experience of it.

My attitude, and preferences, and whether I like it or not…..

…..developed as I grew, learning from all the people around me, taking in what I encountered.

I never thought to inquire about much, I was like a sponge.

No one knows why, or exactly how, life happens.

Not even the most brilliant scholars or genius minds or religious wise-people (although it is amazing to read everything you’re drawn to, if you enjoy it).

So is life itself, hard?

No. I really can’t find this to be absolutely true. I really don’t know what it is.

How do I react when I think this thought, as I listen to the suffering of other people, or remember times I believed I was in pain?

I want to cry and cry. It feels like a grief that is forever.

So sad that such terrible things happen to people, that everyone feels fear sometimes, everyone feels physical pain, loss and agnst.

But who would you be without the belief in the absolute-ness or grand broad idea that life itself is hard?

Not like denial, not like trying to slap a smile on, or think positively.

Just not acting like you’re sure having life itself, being alive, is HARD?

Who would I be without this thought?

I’d feel a pin of light on the inside of myself, maybe back behind my heart, that is here and accepting of everything, knowing I’m here as this body/mind but also perceiving more than what is here.

Just like a flower or a tree, I grow, I live, I die.

Nothing to be done.

Except to be, to wait, to feel the stillness, to feel the balance and unknown mystery of it all.

What if you collapsed and relaxed absolutely everything inside of you, everything about yourself?

Your muscles, your feelings, your mind, your hands, your eyes, your thinking, your breathing?

If you let it all relax, nothing to do…..what do you notice?

I noticed that’s the practice of who I would be without believing my thought that life is hard.

I don’t even have to actually NOT HAVE the thought….

…..only to feel the imagination enter my mind.

Who would I be, without believing that life is hard, even in the middle of loss, hopelessness, loneliness, or being with other people and their suffering?

Turning the thought around: life is easy.

Woah.

I actually have nothing to do with it.

It couldn’t really get much easier, you know?

It’s being completely run by something other than my mind, that’s for sure. I’m participating in it, without choice.

What could be easier than that?

Double-woah.

Except for my thoughts about “life”, it is the easiest thing in the world.

“The only time we suffer is when we believe a thought that argues with what is.” ~ Byron Katie in Loving What Is

 

What about in the middle of such terrible suffering, hearing about the story of someone who accidentally killed someone? Or suffered childhood abuse? What about wars and violence? What about dying of disease? Rage? Starvation? Thirst?

How about the turnaround: my thinking is hard.

If I did not believe my thoughts, I would see the suffering, but also the joy, in the experience of living.

I could find having no heavy opinion, no wish for it to be different than it is.

I wouldn’t feel hopeless, either, oddly enough–I wouldn’t treat myself like I’m a jerk for thinking life is hard sometimes.

I’d just notice, that’s the way of it. I have a brain, it turns out. Nothing wrong with that.

I would notice that in the moment I am picturing this man’s terrible story, I am actually in a room full of loving curious supportive people, all sharing this together, with unconditional love.

I almost missed it.

 

“It’s very simple: When we believe our stressful thoughts, we suffer; but when we question our stressful thoughts, we don’t suffer. We end our suffering. I’ve been told that the whole point of the Buddha’s teaching is the end of suffering. It’s the Fourth Noble Truth, Stephen tells me. Yes, human beings suffer when they don’t know how not to, and yes, it is possible to end all suffering simply by waking up to the difference between what is reality and what isn’t.” ~ Byron Katie in her Newsletter October 2012 

 

You mean, I can question the difficulty, sadness, or suffering….

….of anything?

Yes, anything.

 

“All suffering is mental. It has nothing to do with the body or with a person’s circumstances.” ~ Byron Katie in 1000 Names For Joy  

 

Thank you everyone for coming along for the ride, for bringing your thoughts, concerns, worries, confusion, and despair to this Great Inquiry.

Who would we be without believing our stressful thoughts?

Noticing how shared this experience is, and how much we all love each other.

 

Excited.

Grateful.

Full of wonder.

Coming up with genius ideas for how to proceed.

Aware that the worst story, the one running in my head that isn’t even mine, is actually……over.

What do you notice right now in your reality?