We’re in Month #10 of Year of Inquiry. The final quarter of the year.
Our topic is to go to your worst fears, your deepest stressful beliefs, your experience of loss, endings, death, goodbyes.
You don’t have to conjure up a horrible scenario (although this can be really fascinating to do with The Work–to look at what frightens you most and take it to inquiry).
We’re looking sincerely at what’s occurring in life, how we’re feeling about All This, and writing down what we think about it.
Now here’s a weird thing going on with people in Year of Inquiry, and it’s happened before.
Some are facing the illness of people they love, or recent near-death of someone they know, or a slightly new chapter on a life situation like a job ending, a decision looming, separation from their partner. Someone even began yesterday with a one-month sabbatical from their work, coinciding with this topic of change, fear, loss, or worry.
Maybe, it’s just that people when doing The Work as a regular practice month to month begin to get to the core underlying beliefs they really, truly, honestly want to question.
Our greatest worries and fears.
One incredibly powerful expression uttered by Byron Katie is the following saying that knocked my mind open the first time I heard it, and it still blows me away: “The only problem, is an unquestioned thought.”
Wait….what?
With all the difficulty, sadness, grief, shock and horrifying things that happen in the world….
….can it really be true that the thoughts about what’s happening is what causes the most pain?
The mind will race around, ready to argue that if you accept what is, you won’t “fight” for what’s right, or help change the world, or change your own life for the better.
Surely, says the mind, it’s the event, the way something happened, the way that person acted, the words I heard, the thing I lost….
….that created pain.
Right?
If it had not happened that way, then I’d be fine.
Are you sure, though?
Are you positive you can’t be fine, even with all the sh*t that went down? Are you absolutely sure you can’t be happy, even though you lost him or her or that?
Who would you be without your story that when “x” happens (death, pain, cancer, bankruptcy, divorce, injury, conflict, mental illness)….
….It. Is. Awful.
What if the opposite was true?
What if something, at least one thing, came out of whatever happened……that served me, or someone else?
What if it simply wasn’t as devastating as I thought? What if, even though people die, or I will die, I can trust the way it goes?
I notice death and endings and loss happen.
What if this is the way of it, reality…..and it’s OK? Even good? Or atleast undetermined and unknown?
Can I really know as much as God or the whole totality of the universal plan? Can I be sure of what I’m seeing when using only my mind to decide what’s good and what’s bad?
Can I really know the things I’ve learned, or believed, to be terrible…..ARE terrible?
No. I can’t answer “yes” honestly.
I do not know that what I believe to be horrific, or devastating, or terrifying eternally fundamentally is horrific.
When something seriously difficult has happened, I’ve hated it at first maybe, or been afraid, but I’ve lived through it (so far)….
….and I can’t find a time I didn’t learn something, grow in some way, change for the better, find connection with others, become amazed by the support available, or find love at the bottom of the fear.
Try it for yourself.
Find the worst thing that ever happened to you.
Write it down, so you don’t switch around the words or get tricky or decide you’d rather not look at this troubling thought.
Take it to inquiry.
It may be the best thing you ever did for yourself….to question your mind.
“And then the full horror of the situation appeared…..Immediately inquiry arose: ‘I am this’–is it true? Is it true that I am this forever? How do I react when I believe that? What would I be without the thought?….Thought and questions arose at the same instant and canceled each other out. The horror was equivalent to a deep gentleness, a caressing, a full, immovable acceptance. There was no discomfort….I wanted nothing other than what is.” ~ Byron Katie in 1000 Names For Joy
If you’d like to sit in the presence of Byron Katie via live video as they stream her silent retreat from Switzerland July 9-12 (only 6 weeks away) then please join me for only $165 to attend the entire event in a large, very comfortable, private retreat lodge in far northeast Seattle area. Already half full, there is space for you if you need/want to spend the night (for a very reasonable additional fee–please let me know if you’re interested).
Last year we filled to the max (24) so I encourage you to sign up now. If you can only attend a part of the retreat, you will still have individual access to the videos of Katie for a minimum of one day (everyone will get to sign up for their favorite additional personal viewing time–when they can log-in by themselves in their own home through August 31st.)
Being With Byron Katie retreat is a once-a-year experience and no other retreats are like it. Our local Seattle event will be held in silence in between all sessions with Katie, and we’ll watch all sessions on a huge flat screen, and listening together.
To sign up for this amazing (and remarkably inexpensive way to be with Katie for 4 days) please click HERE.
Much love, Grace