Soooooo excited about so many people coming from all over the country to spend a weekend together in our Year of Inquiry group. They are here! Arrived in Seattle!
The anticipation! The happiness! Hand-clapping!
Because….I love doing The Work all weekend. There is depth and clarity by staying with the process in a steady, consistent way. Even when we change it up (partners working with each other, group exercises, walking, imagining life in our turnarounds) it’s like we’re saying we love the company of our own minds.
OK, well, maybe that’s getting a bit carried away….because one of the deeper reasons people gather together to inquire is because sometimes, the company of our own minds has NOT been loving.
It’s been downright nuts!
Not long ago, I spent some time with a wonderful inquirer who was looking with anticipation at an upcoming event.
She was going to be seeing an old flame, at a wedding. She was not feeling very happy about it.
He’s going to try to come over and talk with me. He’s going to ask why we broke up again. He’s going to beg, or cause a scene.
I asked her if she was positive that was true?
She couldn’t know. It was in the future. In fact, she actually couldn’t even REALLY know that he would be there. She just HEARD that he would be.
How did she react when she believed the thought that it would be uncomfortable to see Mr. X out in the world?
Tense, now, in this very moment (3 months, by the way, before the event). A rush of adrenaline pulsing through her. Anxious. Worried.
I remember having the same kinds of thoughts. Someone I hadn’t seen in over 2 years. Big event with many people. Every day I would think about what I might do when I ran into him…and fortunately I had The Work and I would come up with “I don’t know” and wind up chuckling.
I even imagined hugging him and being so happy to see him.
But I know what it’s like when it’s not so funny. When the person you have in mind hurt you. Badly. When things were a mess between you, and you feel unresolved, you feel fear.
So, without forcing yourself to go anywhere, or do anything you might not want to do….who would you be without the belief that the person in question could hurt you? Or cause a scene? Or ask you questions you think you don’t want to answer?
What if you turned it all around and you felt the same kind of anticipation I myself feel about all the wonderful people coming over to inquire together all weekend at our retreat?
Right in this moment now, what if this was possibility, thrill, joy, wonder, and living in an I-Don’t-Know state?
“Anyone in harmony with what is has no past to project as a future, so there’s nothing she expects. Whatever appears is always fresh, brilliant, surprising, obvious and exactly what she needs….For her, everything is new. She has never seen it before. In the innocence of not knowing, in the wisdom of not needing to know, she can see that everything as it appears in the moment is always benevolent.” ~ Byron Katie
Always benevolent.
Even the possibility of “benevolent”….so fun, so exciting.
Maybe you can not only handle that thing that’s going to happen, that person, that test, that evaluation, that encounter, that interview….
….maybe its good, good, good. No matter what the outcome.
Love, Grace