I’m not heading to Los Angeles to the Cleanse after all.
It’s weird the way things unfold. Almost never as expected, never as truly anticipated.
In fact, right now I really have no idea what’s happening next week!
Except it’s not likely I’ll be driving to the airport and getting on an airplane, given I just cancelled my flights. Nope, I’ll be right here in Seattle doing many family things with my kid who is home from college, and my husband who’s having a birthday.
Staying home seems the way of it.
It doesn’t even seem like Staying Home Vs. Going To An Event is a pro-con situation. Both are fantastic.
I can even picture the joy of either one of them, the fun of each day, the activities that could be possible, the insights, the awareness, the learning, the laughing.
Sometimes….people have a bit of trouble when two choices both seem wonderful.
When there are so many possibilities!
Here’s a sneaky little thought that I discovered would sometimes cloud my clarity and make me very torn between two decisions, if I started to believe it:
Later, in the future, it would be *terrible* to feel regret about this decision.
Therefore, I must prevent that bad, shameful, guilty, disappointed feeling from ever happening.
The way to prevent that terrible, shameful, my-fault feeling from happening, is to make DANG SURE you make the right decision NOW so you feel all good later on….
….like you can say “I made the right decision, I rocked it, I made this happen, yeah baby!”
And strut across the room with confidence and pride.
Not the opposite outcome. The opposite would suck.
The opposite is very possible….so WATCH OUT.
Pause.
Pretty stressful, right?
If so much is weighing on a future moment when it could be your entire fault that you feel disappointed, or happy, then you may carry the weight of responsibility that’s very crushing.
Who would you be without the belief that this decision in the present moment is creating a future experience of happiness OR unhappiness?
Who would you be without the belief that a decision between two, or several, options is CRITICAL for your happiness? Or even other peoples’ happiness?
Wow. Seriously?
But all the books and teachings and philosophies scream that whatever I decide today invents my future, creates my reality later on….right?
It’s up to me! I needa make a good decision, really….I have to pick the “right” sandwich on the menu or I’ll have a sucky or fabulous time eating lunch.
There is a Wrong Decision and a Right Decision.
Isn’t there?
Stop!
You’re supposed to know the future?
Who would you be without that thought?
Back to what’s going on HERE.
Noticing that right now today, stuff is happening, options are being presented. I am dreaming of events, moments, time passing, jet planes, airports, hugging people, staying right here in this city, connection, conversations, being with people I absolutely love….strangers or family….all of it different incredible flavors.
Noticing that no matter where I am, it’s possible to enjoy what is.
Turning the thoughts around….
….there is absolutely no way to know how the future will go. It doesn’t matter what I choose. I look at the options with joy, I pick, it’s over.
Balance.
What if I couldn’t miss anything? What if there is no rhyme or reason or need to do anything for this outcome I think I seek? What if nothing is required?
What if there is no preventing disappointment, or generating pride, no way to determine success or failure, based on the decision?
What if none of this is *entirely* up to me?
I notice a great peace with people who stop trying to make the right decision with such vengeance.
“The Master stays behind; that is why she is ahead. She is detached from all things; that is why she is one with them. Because she has let go of herself, she is perfectly fulfilled.” ~ Tao Te Ching #7
Stay, go.
Right now, good.
Put down your burden. Fulfilled right now.
Much love, Grace
Click here to register for MONEY teleclass Tuesdays 5:15 pm Pacific time 8 weeks, teleclass, awesome insights into learning to love your Money Story.