I love all the notes, letters, comments and communication I receive from readers. People are on amazing human journeys, studying themselves and their consciousness. It is incredible to be a part of it.
Recently, I received the following note, and it prompted my own curious thoughts about how we each move and flow in the world, saying “yes, please!” or “no, thank you!”
Grace, I really appreciate how much of a commitment it is for you to create a blog each day and the intentions for the Blog pieces are beautiful. I have noticed that I have stopped opening these e-mails because I find the titles “negative” and I do not want to relate to them or they do not relate to my own empowered experience. I am not sure what you are trying to achieve by your choice of titles but for me I just have a “no~ thank you” to them.
I was touched by how kind this person’s email was, and honest.
Many people arrive at a place where they are willing to do The Work, or ask for help, or find a new way to be with Reality because they are FILLED with painful, horrific, negative, violent thoughts.
They know there might be another way to look at their predicament…but they don’t know how to do it. They are stuck.
The “negative” and profoundly stressful thoughts are like sirens going off, letting us know that something is wrong.
Usually in life, we humans think the thing that is wrong is that someone has done something terrible to us, we’ve been unlucky, illness has visited us, we have bad karma, there is something wrong with us at a very deep level that needs to be corrected.
We think the universe is unfriendly, we think it’s chaotic and unpredictable and terrifying.
These are very painful but also, very powerful thoughts. They feel true. We assume they are true, we can’t see that there is something different between what we think and who we actually ARE.
I have felt this way so many times! My mind still comes up with doozies….it’s sort of hilarious really. Suddenly it will occur to me “something terrible could happen” and I’m not even sure how it enters. Then I will laugh. It cannot seem to take hold.
I attribute this kind of change in the way I react to stressful beliefs to doing self-inquiry. Questioning my thinking over and over again.
I have thought and believed the lowest, most negative, most horrible, terrible, dreadful thoughts. The ones many people have thought (I have discovered I am not alone in my painful thinking).
This may be why I can hear, without fear, the same kinds of thoughts from others. But this does not mean that I might not experience fear or difficulty staying present with someone and their “negative” thoughts.
I do get to witness and decide for myself, just like the wonderful reader who wrote, who notices she prefers more positive titles.
I have two people I can think of right in this moment who I said “no” to in the past. I have appreciation in my heart for both of them, and a prayer of sorts from my human side, that hopes their individual paths lead them to the end of suffering before death.
But I also knew, deep in my heart, that I was not the person to help them. I knew they could find other help, without ME. I would have been expecting myself to be above and beyond my own evolution to think I should stay engaged with them in the dances we had going.
It is amazing to know what you want, what flavor you like, what color you prefer, what places you enjoy most, what environments delight you, what brings you joy.
As Joseph Campbell said so famously “follow your bliss”.
When you notice you are presented with something that is NOT your bliss, then halleluia! Time to investigate why, look at it from every angle, study it, bring on the curiosity about it, wonder about it.
But it doesn’t mean I have to go intentionally walk into the middle of the gunfire. It doesn’t mean I have to live with someone I don’t want to. It doesn’t have to mean I need to eat food I’m allergic to, stay at my difficult job, talk on the phone when I don’t want to, or stay subscribed to a blog that isn’t fun for me.
What is one thing you notice in your life that you don’t feel drawn to right now? What if you said “no, thank you!” Is there anything stressful that arises by thinking of saying No? Question it!
And….I’d love to know if there is any additional way I can serve you, excite you, inspire you, bug you, or invite you to inquiry. I’d love to hear from you what works and what doesn’t.
And remember, in the end you don’t have to DO anything. Only follow the inner voice that is gentlest and kind, that tells you what you like or don’t like, what is perfect or not for you. Follow the voice that speaks kindly, with no “shoulds”. The universe is guiding and working with you to bring you to just the right place, at the right time, in the right way.
“The gentlest thing in the world overcomes the hardest thing in the world. That which has no substance enters where there is no space. This shows the value of non-action. Teaching without words, performing without actions: that is the Master’s way.”~Tao Te Ching #43
Love, Grace