The other day, as I listened to the people inquire on the Summer Camp call, I had the thought…..people are absolutely astonishing.
So awake, so full of wisdom.
People have taken a dive in for only the first week out of five, and not everyone can make it to every call of course….
….but the thoughts being investigated for their truth are quite deep and expansive.
Here are a few of what we’ve been delving into so far:
I am (insert my name here)
I can’t stop with only one (cookie, kiss, thought)
I don’t want to be alone
I need more money
I need to be secure
When looking at stressful thought, we noticed how deeply and quickly it follows a dramatic trail of suffering sometimes.
One second, I’m on the couch being me, no worries.
The next second, a thought enters and I feel fear.
Something about this isn’t safe.
A participant in Summer Camp shared how she feels afraid so much of the time.
This basic very stressful thought is so powerful to question: I am not safe.
The first thing to do if you feel overwhelmed with fear, is to make a list of the top five things.
You might say “I have no idea, I just feel fear and anxiety! I’m an anxious sort of person! It’s terrible!”
Thank you for sharing, mind.
And now, pick just one thing you’ve found personally frightening in your life.
A specific situation.
This helps you get so very close and connected to that memory, that occurrence in your life….no matter how old.
You weren’t safe in that situation?
Is it true?
I notice when I have this belief that I wasn’t safe, every time, I survived.
Which is why I’m writing this now. I’m still here.
So no, it is not true that I wasn’t safe. Ever.
How do I react when I believe it’s possible to be threatened….
….and I have the proof of that particular situation I remember, the one where I thought I wasn’t safe?
I get all freaked out in the moment when I’m remembering it. I might even wake up at night, thinking. Even though I’m lying in bed, and it’s super safe.
Even though nothing is actually happening now….except thinking.
So who would I be without the belief in danger?
Alive. Laughing. Jumping in the water. Asking for help. Sharing. Slowing down. Watching.
Doing The Work.
Who would you be without the thoughts that you are (insert name here) or you need more of anything, or you can’t stop with just one, or you don’t want to be alone?
What if you turned all these around?
I am not (insert my name here)
I can stop with only one (cookie, kiss, thought)
I do want to be alone
I do not need more money
I already am secure
Could these be just as true, or truer?
I am already amazed by the wisdom and beauty of these fellow inquirers in Summer Camp For The Mind.Everyone brings to me the reminder, the joy and excitement, of what is available right here, right now.Freedom. Security. Safety. Silence. Mystery. Infinity. Trust.
“You’re imagining yourself right out of existence. It’s not a small thing we’re doing here….And there’s nothing that’s not good news, if your mind is right.” ~ Byron Katie speaking in Being With Byron Katie
Much love,
Grace
P.S. Summer Camp is still four more weeks starting Wednesday at noon. Click the link to see the schedule, and join us for the un-doing adventure. In a good way.
Breitenbush: The Inner Path….In The Woods and in The Work
A woman brand new to The Work had come to the Breitenbush retreat that just ended yesterday.
She made this remark at the end of Day #1.
I had guided everyone very slowly through the process of filling out a Judge Your Neighbor worksheet on one particularly stressful situation in their lives.
Someone who really disturbed them, recently or in the distant past. The state of their health. Worries about money. A painful divorce. A difficult child. An irritating boss.
Everyone had identified beautifully what they really thought about the troubling situation or person in their lives….
….the one they really wanted to resolve.
I facilitated several people in the morning, with the whole group together in a big circle. We had then moved into other exercises and done inquiry all day. Everyone staying with the same worksheet, the same situation they began the retreat with.
And now….
….at the end of this full day….
….she was feeling frustrated.
I don’t understand how to answer these questions. I don’t understand the structure here. I don’t understand why you pause to wait for answers. The gap, the silence is uncomfortable. I want this to go faster.
She went on…
…I’ve read the book (Loving What Is). I had never even known exactly who Byron Katie a little while ago. I’ve tried everything. I was hoping this would work. But now, I’m not so sure.
I remembered feeling that way, even after reading Loving What Is.
What?? How do I answer these questions??!!
“OK. Let’s do something different,” I said.
This wasn’t what I had planned on doing right then. A request had been made, through this beautiful confused person who was trying to understand this powerful and deep way of ending suffering through questioning thought.
I stood up and walked to the white board.
“No worksheet. Just say out loud a very painful thought you believe. You think this about life, about you, about others, about God. What hurts?”
People started to speak slowly.
I am all alone. It’s my fault. Something terrible is going to happen.
And then….
….they were coming in faster than I could write them all, filling up the board.
He abandoned me. She hated me. I don’t deserve to be happy. My body is too old. I’ll never be peaceful. God must be punishing me. She died. I am not enough. I don’t have enough. Nobody loves me. My life has been wasted. He shouldn’t have suffered. He should have stayed. There’s not enough time. The world is a dangerous place. People hurt me. I am no good. She should have gone to jail.
“Everyone stand up! And close your eyes!” I said, putting the cap on the pen.
“Pick your thought. The one that hurts. The one you secretly worry about.”
“Now, silently answer these questions….”
“Is it true? (silent moment) Are you positively sure it is true? (silent moment).
“How do you react when you think this thought?….
….Begin to walk around slowly. Walk around the room, feeling this thought. Where do your eyes want to go? Where do they want to gaze? How do you move when you have this thought running through your mind? What happens in your body?”
Everyone started moving.
We moved and milled about and felt for a long while, maybe fifteen minutes.
“Now, pause,” I said….”Move into a pose that reflects how you feel with this thought.”
People crunched down into little balls. People put their foreheads against the wall and stood as still as a cement statue. They lay down on the floor. They squeezed their eyes tightly shut.
I myself hunched over looking at the ground. I felt sullen, listless, sunken in.
“So who would you be without your thought?”
“Slowly begin to move again, without your story. How would you move without this thought? What do you want to look at now? What is it like to be in your body? How do you feel about the other people in the room, without your stressful belief?”
I took a moment to straighten up. I had my own eyes closed, but softly without tension. It took me a moment to feel it.
I opened my eyes and turned towards the room to see people with smiles, people jumping, hugging. Hugs everywhere! Tears streaming down cheeks. People looking up, into each other’s eyes. Connecting.
The one who had said “I don’t get this” was trembling and I put my arm around her.
Back in our circle of chairs, seated once again….
….the woman who wasn’t getting it shared that for the first time, she began to feel what it was like that her father committed suicide when she was only a child.
And what it would really mean to be without that story, which she had told all her life.
And me?
I was feeling what it was like to be without the thought that I need to help anyone get it, that I must explain The Work well enough, that people should have breakthroughs and be free to change their lives with this self-inquiry….
….the way it has changed mine.
I knew it didn’t matter if no one got it, ever.
But I could move in the moment, as called for. I could switch the plan. I could ditch the plan altogether. I could follow the deepest voice of love that knows what to do, even if it doesn’t.
I knew that this life of self-inquiry and waking up is so unbelievable (literally) and magnificent, so astonishing and loving, so frightening at times and yet so supportive….
….that I couldn’t stop now if I wanted to.
I invite people to do The Work with me because somehow, it’s become my job. But I’m not even sure I thought of this job, ever (actually, I’m sure I didn’t).
It just appeared as the thing to do, and people show up to join me.
It’s the greatest gift and greatest work I’ve ever had. I love that people appear to help me wake up, every day, every retreat, every class, every workshop.
Thank you so much for being here. You are part of the whole package, even if I haven’t met you in person.
Thanks for helping us all wake up.
“Let your feelings tell you when the first lie begins. Then inquire. Otherwise, you get lost in the feelings and in the stories that lead to them, and all you know is that you hurt and that your mind won’t stop racing. And if you inquire, you catch the first lie through noticing your feelings. And you can just stop the mind by putting the story you’re attached to on paper. There’s a portion of your stressful mind stopped, even though it may still be screaming in your head.” Byron Katie in Loving What Is
Here I go into retreat with a most amazing group of inquirers.
I always think everyone is amazing who shows up….they are so unique, wondering about life and themselves, very interested in their own minds.
The power of everyone gathered together with the intention to question stressful thinking creates a gorgeous, visceral, palpable energy.
Places people have been stuck or confused….
….just seem to get unstuck and more clear.
Like when a whole group of people help push a stalled car from stand-still to creeping a long just an inch, to moving faster….then everyone’s running alongside the car and it kick jumps into “on” again!
Cheers! Motor is running! We’re moving again!
So while I deep dive in with all these lovely people at Breitenbush, remember there’s more inquiry time coming….you can do it too.
Next Sunday, July 5th I’m offering a free opening session summer camp inquiry jam. It costs nothing. We’ll do The Work for 2 hours from 8-10 am Pacific.
Join by skype, phone, or your computer (if computer only you’ll be in listen-only chat mode without audio).
All you need to do is come with a pen and paper handy, and an open mind, and we’ll do The Work. It’ll be the kick off session for Summer Camp for The Mind, although it’s not required that you keep going for the entire inquiry blitz month, or even sign up.
Summer Camp For The Mind is doing The Work whenever you choose for 5 days a week (or one or two) from July 6 – August 7.
Here’s the daily schedule (plus there’s two more Sunday 2 hour inquiry sessions also online July 19 and August 2).
Mondays 10-11:30 am PT/1:00-2:30 pm Eastern/6 pm London
Tuesdays 5-6:30 pm PT/8-9:30 pm Eastern/8:00 am Australia
Wednesdays noon-1:30 pm/3-4:30 pm Eastern/9 pm Europe
Thursdays 9-10:30 am/noon-1:30 pm/6-7:30 pm Europe
Fridays 7:00-8:30 am/10:30-noon Eastern/3:00 pm London
Read all about how it works right HERE.It’s sliding scale, so choose what you contribute from $97 – $297.
Can’t wait to do The Work with you!
“Inquiry is a way to end confusion and to experience internal peace, even in a world of apparent chaos. Above all else, inquiry is about realizing that all the answers we ever need are always available inside us. Inquiry is more than a technique: It brings to life, from deep within us, an innate aspect of our being. When practiced for awhile, inquiry takes on its own life within you. It appears whenever thoughts appear, as their balance and mate. This internal partnership leaves you free to live as a kind, fluid, fearless, amused listener, a student of yourself, and a friend who can be trusted not to resent, criticize, or hold a grudge. Peace and joy naturally, inevitably, and irreversibly make their way into every corner of your mind, into every relationship and experience….You used to hurt and now you don’t.” ~ Byron Katie in Loving What Is
Join me on July 5th or in Summer Camp For The Mind and with the help of the group, attention and inquiry….bring to life the innate aspect of your being that’s unhurt, and free.
“You either believe what you’re thinking, or you question it….there’s no other choice”. ~ Byron Katie“OK, I’ll take questioning it.” ~ Grace Bell
After many requests and inquiries about the dates, times and plans for Year of Inquiry (YOI) group for 2015-2016….
….plus someone recently saying“put me on the list for YOI this fall, I’m definitely in!”….
….I thought I’d let you know YOI is coming kinda early, so you can decide to apply once I open up the application process.
If you’re drawn to dive into this ongoing work with others in a deep, committed way, and you’ve found you don’t do The Work as regularly as you’d like, YOI may be for you.
[stextbox id=”custom” caption=”Year of Inquiry Applications Open In July–Program Begins Sept 2015″][/stextbox]
YOI is a small group of inquirers from all over the world who meet together for a year, starting in September.
It’s not a training to learn exactly how to facilitate inquiry (although you will).
It’s not a certification or something you need to pass or graduate from (in fact, people re-enroll year after year).
This group consists of people dedicated and deeply intending to jostle their stressful beliefs loose from their conditioned ways of relating to people, to themselves, to life. To wonder about their troubling stories. To practice catching their stressful thoughts that can take off like a bullet, and begin to honestly slow down, slow down….
….and discover the awe of being what it’s like to not believe stressful thought.
Wow. It’s a such an incredible journey.
And not easy to do alone.
In fact for me, impossible.
I began self-inquiry using the Work of Byron Katie in 2003. I joke around (although it’s basically true) that I didn’t really actually DO The Work until I attended the School for The Work in 2005 and was surrounded by people questioning their beliefs every day for 9 days.
Then, I did The Work in earnest.
I got what it could be for me.
It was a new way of life, entirely. It became deeply compelling. Even a matter of life or death….a way to not move like a magnet towards negative drama, suspicious thinking, worry, anxiety, anger, terror.
It felt like I moved in and out of a sea of stressful thought daily. I began to see the nature of my mind. So worried all the time. So freaked out when “bad” stuff happened!
I was like a nervous ninny about life. I thought I needed to control myself….all the time, in practically every way.
Love, money, friends, health, family, partners…..oh my! So much could go wrong! So much imperfection in the world!
Back in 2005, I made a huge leap into peace when I discovered the value of questioning my stressful thoughts.
It wasn’t easy for me. I didn’t see any changes right off the bat. But fortunately, I knew to not focus on results. (I learned to not EVER do this, eventually).
Instead, I learned to be in this moment now, inquiring into what felt painful to think.
I knew I was hooked.
I also had a mind so fast, it would compulsively scream (on the inside) that being at peace was dangerous, or not possible, and that I should be on alert like a coiled spring!
I went on my first longer meditation retreat that same year, in 2005, and found myself so busy mentally during the immense silence, I couldn’t sleep well, I had vivid dreams, and I felt like I might go crazy.
Talk about drama.
A short while later, through beautiful unfolding circumstances, I became a facilitator of this work.
First and foremost, it felt like a gift of the deepest joy to ME.
Yes, it was selfish. But finally, in a good way.
Before I learned self-inquiry, I was selfish in a very self-critical way. I felt self-hatred, fear, rage and confusion about being here as a human. I was at war with reality, which included myself.
I constantly had questions: what is life for? why am I here? what’s going on? what should I do? how do I calm down? how can I become a better person?
I had done therapy, workshops, read a thousand books, been on a spiritual hunt for peace.
But finally, I had a way to inquire into my compulsive anxiety, my addiction to thinking and believing I was what I thought.
I have now practiced inquiry for these past ten years, with the support of all of you who show up in my life to share this amazing process of awakening and the discovery of peace.
It’s very simple really.
The mind likes complicated. It wants more, bigger, better, more …. endlessly.
But in YOI, we keep it simple, and through this simple structure in Year of Inquiry, we commit to answering the four questions, hearing other peoples’ answers, working under the umbrella of a new and often-stressful topic every month, and sharing in the enlightenment journey.
Together, we’re waking up to reality, one inquiry session at a time.
The way Year of Inquiry works is, first….
….you get to stay connected to inquiry for an entire year.
Year of Inquiry starts in September 2015 and ends in June 2016, with a virtual summer camp for July and August also included for every YOI member (Summer Camp For The Mind is an intensivedaily 5 weeks of inquiry set up to keep you deeply in the process–you can join any sessions you like).
All that’s required for regular participation in YOI is being able to dial in with your phone or with skype (it’s free) to a private teleconference line.
We have virtual inquiry sessions 3 times a week (at different hours) for 3 weeks every month (usually the first three).
You can sign up for telesessions only, if you live very far away like Indonesia, South Africa, Japan or Germany (we’ve had people from 7 countries and 10 states participate).
Or, you can sign up for the Full YOI Program and join me for a fall and a spring retreat, each 3 full days (Friday-Sunday) of exercises built to help identify stressful thoughts, personal cleansing inquiry, and sharing with like-minded people who learn the truth of who you are.
As one Year of Inquiry member wrote recently, in our 8th month of inquiring together:
Grace,
So, here’s what I’ve been noticing in the last few days. I have stressful beliefs ALL OF THE TIME. I had never even recognized it, but knew something might be off in the way I felt (emotionally or physically). I’m really seeing my stressful beliefs and how I think things SHOULD go. I’m really understanding now that if I have a worksheet on someone or something…it is how I see everything.
I wanted to express my gratitude. (YOI member).
Now here’s the thing.
There are no guarantees such as “you will feel glorious, you will be liberated, you will wake up” or any such claims about doing YOI.
But you know that already.
Like other inner journeys unique to you, you may find the arrow is shooting out in a certain direction, but no telling when or how it will land exactly.
I notice, I have no idea when or how this work “works” for anyone, or even for myself.
I just know it does.
My life is absolutely nothing like it was when I began self-inquiry using this simple method introduced by Byron Katie (deep bow of gratitude for Katie, forever).
My inquiry has expanded into areas I never dreamed it would expand. This mind does its thing, and something within watches, chuckles, and rests at peace, joyfully.
The peace is here, and has been the entire time….
….I just never saw it before.
I cherish those who appear in Year of Inquiry, each and every one of you. You are a part of my path.
What a wonderful journey it is.
If you’re interested in reading more about YOI, have questions about the details and the fees (these vary depending on your level of participation)….
Doing The Work with others brings deep and powerful support and connection
Only 4 spots left for Being With Byron Katie, an unusual event where we’ll be watching Katie on screen via internet as she teaches a retreat in Switzerland July 11-14.
Because this event is via internet, the cost is only $165 for all four days. These last spots available are for commuters only (a mattress may be free for you if you want to sleep in our big private rented lodge). We’ll have a ball together (24 people total), share potluck lunch, and have one hour of silent sitting meditation each day at 2:30 pm.
A fantastic group of people interested in questioning stressful thinking. What could be more wonderful?
Perhaps Breitenbush Retreat June 24-29!
This is a deep intensive dive into your inner world of stressful thinking, where you will get to do The Work with me and the incredible group who always assembles for 4.5 days. We gather to declare peace through this powerful self-inquiry.
Breitenbush Hotsprings is a gorgeous conference center located in old growth forest in Oregon. This retreat also has 20 people registered (capacity is 28) so call soon to make your reservation 503-854-3320.
The Breitenbush Retreat offers mental health counselors 26 CEUs.
********
Speaking of gatherings and retreats, it seems like a summer full of contemplative activities, doing this powerful work, is spread before me.
In only two weeks, all the people in Year of Inquiry who can come, plus some Year of Inquiry alumni, will be arriving in Seattle and coming to my cottage to do The Work for three days.
My hands are clapping!
I love that it doesn’t matter where you are for this work.
You can be deeply concerned, very frightened about a particular issue or situation or person….
….or concerned about something that seems petty and small, and unimportant in the big scheme of things.
Long ago, a dear friend and inquirer and I had made plans to exchange facilitation in The Work.
She had facilitated me through a worksheet I wrote on my impending divorce.
I felt sick to my stomach, almost every day.
I was terrified I would never find a job, my money was draining out of my bank account faster than the sinking Titanic, I was a bundle of pain and agony.
I felt a little lighter after she facilitated me. Like chipping away at a big block of granite, my beliefs about being supported in life getting broken into pieces one hammer-strike at a time.
Then we switched roles.
Now I would facilitate her.
Her stressful belief was on her kitchen drawer.
It wouldn’t open properly, after the recent remodel.
“It should open easily.”
Seriously??
As I asked her the four questions, I noticed with amazement the joy of doing this work on something so apparently insignificant.
I could feel the frustration having a thought like this, that sometimes made me want to bang something around, throw my hands up in frustration, lose my temper in a fury, slam a door, or a drawer, break something.
Who would you be without the belief that this drawer, or anything, should open more easily than it is opening?
What if everything, even a drawer, is exactly in place, doing what it does, without a need to argue with it, or against it?
As my friend answered the questions, it washed through me….
….what if my estranged husband shouldn’t open, either?
What if all was going along in the best way possible?
What if I didn’t get involved in being opposed to or in favor of thislife?
Turning the thought around….
….this dear friend found the opposite: “my mind should open easily”.
WOW!
I chuckled softly.
I could find this, too.
Later, after the phone call was over and we had hung up, I sat silently.
A sense of peace, quiet, and emptiness beyond all words, beyond all thinking, beyond needing to do something or fix anything, wrapped around me.
Everything was going to be OK.
It already was.
Thank you for inquiry, on a drawer in a kitchen that wasn’t even mine.
Sometimes inquiry works in the oddest ways.
“There is no peace in the world until you find peace within yourself in this moment. Live these turnarounds, if you want to be free. That’s what Jesus did, what the Buddha did. That’s what all the famous great ones did, and all the unknown great ones who are just living it in their homes and communities, happily and in peace.” ~ Byron Katie
Do The Work on whatever you see around you that brings you stress. Begin with one situation at a time. Nothing more is required.
You can do this.
Come gather with a group on retreat, if you want support in getting there.
one of these is better than the other….is that true?
I was in a lecture by a dynamic, inspiring motivational speaker about working for yourself.
I had actually spoken on the phone to her before, and taken one of her classes. I liked her. She was really fascinating, actually. How wonderful to hear her amazing story of success.
Until.
Wait. How much money did she just say she made in her first year of being in business for herself? Are you kidding me?
How come she got so successful?
What am I doing wrong?
I made a tenth of what she made in my first year of business. One TENTH. I could barely live on it.
There’s no comparison really.
Plus I think she’s about 25 years younger.
In literally a matter of 60 seconds, I was making plans to go live in Pema Chodron’s monastery next year and throw in the towel.
This is ridiculous. I’ll never get “it”.
There’s no point in going on!!
Have you ever felt the Drama-Queen Extremes?
I jest, but I know the feeling of comparing yourself to someone “better” than you can be quite brutal, debilitating and low.
It’s not all that funny, when you’re in the middle of it.
But who would you be without the thought that you should just give it all up and quit, cash out in despair?
Who would you be without the belief you should push on, never give up, and bore yourself like a drill into your plan of success?
Who would you be without your thoughts? Your comparisons? Your fears of the future? Your regrets of the past?
What would it feel like, in this moment right now as you read these words, to consider neither giving up nor pressing on?
“Normally we try to relax beyond our circumstances. We try to transcend our experience. We try to find truth. We try to wake up. But just imagine the relief you could feel having zero task. You can’t make yourself relax, you can’t make yourself let go, you can’t make yourself tight, you can’t make yourself restricted. The relief to being resigned or relinquished to resting in your experience is immeasurable.” ~ Ross Oldenstadt
Huh?
But WOW.
Suddenly *click* (or maybe more like *kapow!*) I am in this moment noticing faces, sound, voices, air, colors, joy, being this, not being that, being this instead, relating, connecting.
Noticing gratitude, and laughter, at all the compulsive comparing and planning and efforts to not-effort.
Truly, nothing to do. Nowhere to go.
Turning the thoughts around: Making that much money is not required for success. I am not doing it wrong. I am doing it right. I am not “doing” it. The amount of money I have is success. The amounts of monies coming and going have nothing to do with success or lack of success.This life has gone this way, just right.
So glad life moved me into a moment of hearing a speaker that reminded me of comparison that reminded me of inquiry that reminded me of peace and nothing-but-now.
I am alive, I am breathing, I am typing, I sit on a beautiful and comfortable white couch, I laugh at my mind, I feel what’s here that is not a thinking brain, I relax, I celebrate these fairy tales all around me including big happy wild accomplishment stories and big fat failure stories, I notice I’m having a lot of fun with this whole success work-for-yourself thing.
Once upon a time….
Much love,
Grace
P.S. Even though its Mother’s Day, I’m offering a 3 weeks of Sunday sessions doing The Work on Money on 5/10, 5/17 and 5/24 from 9-11 am Pacific Time. By donation. Every session will be recorded….click HERE if you want access to the recordings, to join on any call, or participate with this powerful freedom work.
question your stressful thoughts–change your whole world. Really.
Year of Inquiry (YOI) is a small group of inquirers who connect for an entire year together, starting every September and meeting all year long, changing topics every month.
Yah. It’s intense.
It’s a long commitment.
We’re half way through the year. And we love it.
It’s amazing over time to have a regular practice of collecting together and questioning….deeply.
Who would you BE without that thought, about your body (we happen to be on the BODY month right now) or money, or your primary relationship, or your dad or mom?
Sinking in over and over, together.
The thing I love about a whole year is we come and go, we’re on vacation then we’re back, we show up then we miss a session, but we tap back in, regroup, show up, focus.
Remember.
Over time the practice of inquiring becomes so, so, so fun.
We get to know one another’s voices, wishes, the way we respond in a very intimate way, without ever telling all our stories.
Someone wrote me an email once after reading a Grace Note.
“Don’t you get tired of questioning your thoughts? Isn’t this a little repetitive or obsessive?”
Yes to the second part. Ha ha!
No to the first.
I have NO IDEA why I don’t get tired of this.
Well, OK, maybe there’s an idea.
Somewhere along the way, I realized this work was about ending fear. Ending agony about what happened before and what might happen next.
I also realized there was absolutely nothing else I could do, except question my painful thinking.
Wow. Nothing. No control.
I only had my own mind ultimately to work with, it didn’t work to try to fix or adjust or make the world better.
I could end the drama of needing other people to change, or the environment to change, or this whole world to change….
….in order to actually be happy.
I could actually enter the humor of not being my mind, not taking my thinking seriously….
….and watch this astonishing life unfold with all the flavors, variety, complexity and strangeness of the most inventive, brilliant novel.
With joy.
Not upset.
I love all the people who show up for inquiry, every single day in the groups or telecourses I run.
Everyone doing the best they can, everyone curious….open.
Everyone dropping their limiting stories, on their own path, and sharing this process together, at their own pace.
We do have room for up to three people right now in YOI. We have calls on Tuesday mornings 9 am, Thursday afternoons 4:30 pm, and Fridays 9 am Pacific time. Come to one, two or all three–your choice.
We gather in person for those who can get to the northwest USA May 29-31. But if you’re super far away, like Europe, then you might choose not to travel and that’s OK too (it’s less expensive).
I don’t want anyone to miss out who would love this ongoing opportunity to be in The Work three weeks out of every month and see what regular inquiry can bring to your life.
It looks like freedom.
“Reality–the way that it is, exactly as it is, in every moment–is always kind. It’s our STORY about reality that blurs our vision, obscures what’s true, and leads us to believe that there is injustice in the world. I sometimes say that you move totally away from reality when you believe there is a legitimate reason to suffer….It’s insane to believe that suffering is caused by anything outside the mind. A clear mind doesn’t suffer.” ~ Byron Katie
And of course, even if an organized regular inquiry group isn’t right for you–there are other ways to do The Work with people.
You can call the Help Line (click HERE to use it for free).
“If you want to work with your psyche, you have to loosen up in there…you have to get underneath and see why your psyche is the way it is. It was programmed that way. But you can learn how to interact with life in a wholesome, participatory way. You have the right to relax and let fear pass right through you.” ~ Michael Singer
If you’re in the mood for lightening up, understanding your mind, becoming intimate with reality….
….and you’d like support on your journey….
….then consider coming on board to the upcoming Relationships telecourse, or Year of Inquiry, or Desire and The Work, or Summer Camp for The Mind this coming summer, or Breitenbush 5 day retreat in the spectacular natural Hotsprings of Oregon.
I love connecting with you, questioning the way we all think, and changing our world.
If you’re interested in YOI or another teleclass, hit reply and let me know (your email will go directly to me personally) or visit www.workwithgrace.com and click on teleclasses or programs to see what’s coming up.
There is one spot left in today’s afternoon mini retreat in northeast Seattle: Ask Four Questions, Change Your Life (or Someone Else’s)…How To Find Freedom Within With The Work of Byron Katie.
You’ll learn how to facilitate yourself or someone else through the four powerful questions known as The Work, and what a difference it can make for those who are suffering.
If you can’t make it this time, I’ll do one more mini retreat on December 6th.
Therapists and coaches can earn 4 CEUs for attending. I provide very yummy snacks, teas, and all the materials. $70.
Talking about retreats and workshops reminds me of what it was like for me when I first encountered The Work.
The first time I heard that question….Is It True?….I was sort of stopped short.
Wha?
What you talking about, is it true?
How the heck would I know?
It was almost like I was frustrated or annoyed with the very question.
I had no idea what was, or was not, true.
That was part of the problem!! Floundering around, without a rudder! Going in circles! Repeating the same thoughts over and over again!
But when I really looked beneath that irritable reaction….
….I discovered something very interesting.
I did not trust myself much. At all.
I didn’t realize that I actually had almost never stopped to ask me what I really thought about the things I was stressed out about in life.
My view of myself was that I was a clueless blob.
Except….not really.
What if you really were the only one who could answer that question about something that disturbs you or freaks you out….
….Is It True?
Is it real, what you’re thinking? Is it accurate? Do you have the whole picture? Are you sure you’re right? Are you positive?
If only YOU could say the final answer about what is happening that you don’t like in your life….whether you’ve lost something, missed out, failed, did it wrong, tanked, screwed up….
….what is your answer, really, when you deeply think about it?
Yes, or No?
And here’s what I love about The Work….
….even if you say “yes”, it is completely and absolutely true that it should have gone differently, I’ve failed, I lost, or whatever….
….you still get to ask who you’d be if you couldn’t think that thought was true?
What if it wasn’t? Can you use your imagination and give it a shot?
“Nothing happens ahead of its time, and what needs to happen, always happens.” ~ Byron Katie
The magnificent Serenity Retreat is solidifying. Some incredible people are attending. Please visit my newly updated page to read about what’s being offered for this very high-end intensive in November 2014.
The fee is $12,997 but you’ll be quite astonished at what this includes and who you’ll get to rub elbows with. Take a look.
We’ll dive into inquiry and swim….coming out the other side with a new look at our own leadership of our lives, and what’s next.
****
Today, I’m on my way to Ca-li-for-ni-ay! Road trip!
I will be in silent retreat with a small group very soon. But believe it or not, I plan on writing Grace Notes this time every night.
Because they are like my own meditative inquiry process, and I love sharing with you.
Here’s a few pics from the recent Breitenbush retreat.
I hope you’ll join me for a class soon (see the colored list below after my signature) or the Meetup The Work of Byron Katie North Seattle on July 26th from 2-4 pm at the Lake Forest Park Library (google meetup.com and RSVP).
When I was in graduate school studying Applied Behavioral Science one thing I loved learning about was the very beginning first steps to approaching a “problem”.
Houston, there’s a problem.
OK….now what?
You have a certain (apparently limited) amount of time, you’re over THERE (outer space, for example) and you’d prefer to be back HERE instead (like, on earth).
Or you feel very frightened or anxious, you’d like to feel free before you die (your limited amount of time in years) and you’re not sure how to get from THERE (imprisoned) to HERE (liberated).
Hmmm.
In classes that I took on group work, group processes, and organizational development, the first thing we learned to do was to understand what was presently happening right in that moment, in that situation.
No trying to change it.
That may happen five seconds from now, depending on how speedy you’re trying to be, but first there must be a moment of taking in information and seeing what’s going on.
It’s an Intake Session in the world of health care, or mental health, or change efforts in a group.
This information gathering, the state of affairs in the NOW, is super powerful. That’s why I have people who work with me on food and eating issues keep a journal of their feelings around food, so they can see what’s going on without control, without any efforts to change it.
When you’re reviewing like a researcher your own mind, you may need a little (or a lot ) of help from friends.
Just like the Space Shuttle returning to earth, a team of people all thinking about something together, all discussing, looking, offering ideas, listening, brainstorming….
….these kinds of group connections and interactions and think tanks have always offered me profound, bubbling, powerful insights into PROBLEMS.
Not one of those brilliant engineers alone, all by themselves, could have gotten the astronauts home.
That’s why I love inquiry with a group.
You stay, through your connection to others and the combined power of the group energy….you stay, listen, clarify.
You hear things that make light bulbs go off.
I’ve been on a lot of meditation retreats. Everyone there doesn’t speak hardly one word, and yet we’re gathering with others intentionally.
We’re not in a room all alone (even though that might offer something amazing too).
“It’s important to realize that inquiry is about noticing, not about dropping the thought… Inquiry is not about getting rid of thoughts; it’s about realizing what’s true for you, through awareness and unconditional self-love. Once you see the truth, the thought lets go of you, not the other way around.” ~ Byron Katie
If you’ve been looking for a community, some might call it a sangha, to examine the mind and question your thoughts at a high, repetitive, deeply committed level, then this coming Year of Inquiry may be for you.
We begin in September together, on the phone, and with an in-person retreat for a weekend.
We travel together for an entire year, looking and noticing, and come together again in May for 5 more days in Seattle.
Every month there’s a new problem, to find our way home from.
We all do The Work together and separately, collectively waking up and returning again and again to planet earth.
If you’re ready to read more about a Year of Inquiry, click HERE.
“I feel like I’m tapping into such a good group, all these people with all this experience. I’m ready to learn fast, I feel like it’s on the fast track.” ~ YOI 2013-2014
“I feel I’ve made life-long friends but people who oddly don’t have to know any details about my life, but instead my inner life. This is what is most important to me. I am closer to this group than my regular friends. I feel I have a place of power to question what I believe.” ~ YOI 2013-2014
“I so appreciate this work, and this group. I love this group. I’m so happy that after going to The School, I have a community to keep on track in such a beautiful way.” ~ YOI 2013-2014
If you’re trying to get back to Houston, and you notice you have a problem with your thinking, join this group to question your mind, and change your life.
You can get assistance finding your way back home.
If you’d like to experience telecalls now, to get a feel for how this process might work for you, join us in Summer Camp for July.
