Trying To Control Your Thoughts Is Like Trying To Control The Wind

So many people responded to my little survey asking what my podcast should be named, and what topics you’d like to see addressed.

Thank you! Thank you!

(The name will probably be Peace Talk).

And wow.

There are a lot of topics to address.

Anxiety, fear, depression, pain, money, self-worth, disrespect, misery, wanting appreciation, eating too much, feeling addicted, nervous about the future, not having enough time, wanting to stop all these miserable thoughts!

It’s interesting to notice what we think about thoughts themselves, when they’re difficult.

Not only am I having a rough time here with what happened….but now, even as I sit quietly in a chair, or drive home in an empty car on my commute after a long day at work, or walk to the store for groceries, or lie in my bed at night….

….I’m thinking uncomfortable thoughts.

Arrgh. So annoying.

Why can’t I just be positive? Why do I have to scare myself, or think of worse case scenarios, or obsessively repeat the issue over and over again?

Why can’t I give it a rest?

Interesting thought to questions.

I should stop thinking this way.

Is it true?

Yes. My life would be totally different if only I had stopped thinking depressive, anxious or negative thoughts long, long ago. I should be more positive.

What’s wrong with me?

Can you absolutely know that it’s true that you should stop thinking the way you’re thinking?

Um. Yeah. I will never get enlightened this way. My mind is too anxious too fast too childish.

How do you react when you believe your thoughts are your enemy? When you think you should stop thinking the way you think?

Sour. Angry. Full of self-criticism. Depressed. Tired.

Who would you be, though, if you couldn’t believe you should stop negative or anxious thinking? Has it worked so far to try to stop?

Can you stop thinking, when you yell at yourself for all your crazy thinking?

Notice what happens when you really don’t believe you should stop thinking the way you think.

Something opens up.

Like it’s asking for attention, for you to hold this thought-machine with care, kindness, acceptance, and compassion.

“How can you NOT think about something? It’s thinking you. Thought appears. How can not thinking [or thinking] about it be irresponsible? You either think about it or you don’t. Thought either appears or it doesn’t. It’s just amazing that, after how many years, you think you can control your thinking. Can you control the wind too?” ~ Byron Katie

When I turn the belief around I find “I should keep thinking this way.”

Woah, seriously?

Yes…check it out. Explore this. How could it be of benefit to think the way you’ve thought so far? Even the dark, disturbing thoughts?

It appears to be the way of it.

Even if I don’t know why.

Allowing this mind, these thoughts, this path to be as it is….

without demanding, pushing, striving for these thoughts to be different….

….I notice they are not so intense. They are not so loud. They are almost, suddenly, very funny.

“Our wisdom is all mixed up with what we call our neurosis. Our brilliance, our juiciness, our spiciness, is all mixed up with our craziness and our confusion, and therefore it doesn’t do any good to try to get rid of our so-called negative aspects, because in that process we also get rid of our basic wonderfulness. We can lead our life so as to become more awake to who we are and what we’re doing rather than trying to improve or change or get rid of what we are or what we’re doing.” ~ Pema Chodron

Not being against my own thoughts, the beliefs that float through, the anxiety that creates images, or vice versa, the repetitive thinking…

…I notice letting it be here is soooo restful. Puzzling maybe, but very, very relaxing and restful.

That’s always here, even when thinking is happening.

A great, silent resting place.

And if you can’t feel it, don’t worry. Just notice the thoughts, one by one, and inquire into if they are really true, and who you’d be without them.