I recently got the chance to interview a lovely woman who first learned about The Work from her enrollment in Jacqueline Green’s parenting programs (www.greatparentingshow.com). Jacqueline herself has been a brilliant member of Year of Inquiry and teaches The Work to moms as a core tool for becoming a clearer and more peaceful parent.
Listen to Peace Talk Episode 151 here where Mary shares about writing her first Judge Your Neighbor worksheet, and began to do The Work in earnest….and how it changed life for her.
And in case you haven’t registered yet: Sign Up Here for Ten Barriers That Derail The Work, and How To Dissolve Them, a free workshop open to anyone and everyone online on Sunday, June 30th at 11:00 am Pacific Time/ 7:00 pm UK.
I’ll send out the link for joining the workshop to everyone registered several hours before we begin, so watch your Inbox and bring a pen and paper.
So speaking of parenting and doing The Work….yesterday, a crazy thing happened.
And what’s even more crazy, is I reacted differently than I ever used to act in similar situations.
In fact, the whole thing is completely hilarious.
My husband and I were helping our 22-year old daughter move.
A few big pieces of furniture needed to go from one apartment to the new apartment, along with final boxes and reassembling the bed in the new place.
Boxes were moved, a dump run was made to throw out an ancient mattress and chairs with mould on them (don’t ask me why chairs got set out on the balcony where it rains), a Goodwill donation run was completed, some scrubbing and cleaning was completed, and there was one final item to move: my daughter’s bicycle.
It was on the balcony, chained to the railing.
As my daughter unlocked the chain and rolled the bike from porch through the sliding glass doors into the empty apartment living room she was saying goodbye to….she knocked a can of paint off the railing.
A gallon can of black paint she had been using to paint her bookshelf a few days before.
The lid was loose.
KABLLOOOOOSSSHHHH!
Almost an entire gallon of paint oozing across the porch, and a big huge splash of black paint on the white apartment building wall, on the glass doors, on the bicycle, on all the railings of the porch, and all over my daughter’s news sandals and legs.
OK then.
I’d love to show you a photo of it for dramatic emphasis.
LOL.
Guess what we were doing for the next hour?
Yah, that would be scrubbing the walls, carpet, porch, glass windows, railings with towels, hot water, soap, chemical cleaners and sponges. And throwing paint and rags full of paint away.
Now, in the past, I might have been FURIOUS.
I’m not saying there wasn’t a reaction. It was like….GASP.
But I don’t know if it’s the amount of times I’ve questioned “this shouldn’t be happening” or “this is a mistake” (hundreds) but something almost found it funny in the very moment in happened.
Humor? Instead of being angry?
Wow.
Who are we without the belief “this is a huge horrible mess! OMG!”
We’re rolling up our sleeves, cleaning and chuckling.
How could it be an interesting predicament that the paint can went toppling onto the porch and wall and bicycle?
Well, I certainly have an entertaining story to tell, for one thing.
I also learned by googling how to use hot water and soap to get paint out of a carpet. My daughter learned why it’s a good thing to hammer the paint can lids back on tight. We had all the time we needed to clean it up. We didn’t have to take the paint to the hazardous waste center–it was spilled.
But mostly, for me, I got to notice how the inner fireworks just didn’t happen by comparison to the way they used to.
In the past, I might have banged my fist on the counter and said DAMNIT! And huffed around while cleaning.
Sure, there were some thoughts about how long this would take and if we could get it cleaned up and how this was going to turn out….
….but they didn’t go anywhere much.
We were laughing later.
I said “this might be the best moving story yet!”
If there’s any reason I ever could find to do The Work, this situation and how I responded was an example.
How wonderful to not react to the world as if it’s a horrible moment, a pain-in-the-ass, a huge drag, or to shout “jeez, why didn’t you put the paint lid on correctly?!” at someone I love.
I’d rather do The Work, and laugh.
Much love,
Grace