Today we begin the class Our Wonderful Sexuality: doing The Work on the beliefs we have that create stress, loss, jealousy, pain, anger, sadness or lack of freedom in our lives.
There is room in the class. If you’ve been wanting to talk about sex, your ideas, the rules, your questions, your concerns, in a safe, clear environment….
….then join us right now. It’s awesome.
Just like the Money class that started Monday, I won’t be teaching it for quite awhile as my direction will be towards the exciting Year of Inquiry starting in September.
It’s yet another avenue for the deepest spiritual freedom, this hush-hush topic of sexuality. To be free to be yourself, whatever that looks and feels like, is deeply joyful.
But even without a class…you can start looking at this topic right now. I’ll share with you how you can start unraveling and changing your experience of love relationship and touch, and lightening up.
It starts with memories.
It’s the way you do it with anything you’re inquiring into, really, using The Work of Byron Katie.
A situation occurs….and then there is the memory of it. There is a reaction. Maybe right away, maybe in a few hours, maybe a few years later. The mind starts formulating what it meant, especially if it was painful. And putting it on replay.
Endless replay. Good grief. Can’t we just forget about that gross thing that happened? Or that disappointment?
The mind then projects quicker than lightening into the future that it never wants to experience this bad situation again.
When it comes to sexuality or sexual behavior, people sometimes have moments that are not that great, unfortunately.
What is supposed to be fun, adventurous, easy and loving is embarrassing, dark, addictive, sad, disappointing or violent.
If you’re ready to look closely, here’s what you can do.
First, make a list of your troubling memories.
That time you were ten and you learned…That time you were fifteen and the boy kissed you and then….That time you found out….That situation when you expected this but you got that….That time you were shocked and scared….That time she said this, and he did that…
Then pick only one situation that was particularly upsetting. Hold that situation clearly in your mind, and write down the answers to these questions (you can find the Judge Your Neighbor worksheet at www.thework.com):
- why were you upset?
- how do you want that person(s) who bothered you to change in that situation?
- what should have happened? what shouldn’t have happened?
- what did you need from that person in order to be happy, instead of upset?
- describe what you see when you look at that person or those people in that memory
- what do you never, ever want to have happen again in this situation?
When you carefully consider these questions, and answer them, you have in front of you, on paper, your objections, your discomfort, your resistance, your irritation.
Doing The Work on that situation doesn’t mean the experience changes, because it happened already.
But it does mean you may be able to discover a center of peace within yourself, no matter what happened to you in the past.
That’s a very, very valuable thing. Maybe the most valuable thing in life.
“Remember, if you close around something, you will be psychologically sensitive about that subject for the rest of your life. Because you stored it inside of you, you will be afraid that it will happen again. But if you relax instead of closing, it will work its way through you. If you stay open, the blocked energy inside of you will release naturally, and you will not take on any more.” ~ Michael Singer
The very act of doing The Work, walking slowly but surely through the four questions and finding turnarounds, is an act of courage and an intention to open your mind to great change.
To see what happened and feel resolved about it. So YOU can be happy.
It works, if you answer the four questions.
The most amazing troubled experiences can be put in their place forever….
….in the past.
They are over.
“As long as you think that the cause of your problem is ‘out there’–as long as you think that anyone or anything is responsible for your suffering–the situation is hopeless. It means that you are forever in the role of victim, that you’re suffering in paradise.” ~ Byron Katie
Ready to find freedom from your beliefs when it comes to physical contact with others? Need support in doing it?
Sign up to meet for 8 weeks. You’ll be glad you did.
Much love,
Grace