As I look out a large picture window at the Taipei, Taiwan airport I see huge thick gray clouds and rain coming down, and lots of green trees. On initial glance it looks like Seattle, my home town.
Then on closer look, I notice palm trees inter-mixed with trees that look like pines. That’s definitely different.
Notice how the mind, through my eyes, is comparing. It’s like it has a check list, faster than a speeding bullet: familiar, familiar, not familiar, weird, unusual, totally unfamiliar, familiar.
It seems like the mind is a machine, trying to make sense of what it sees, hears, smells, feels, tastes.
Traveling in a big jet for thousands of miles and looking down at ocean and space will make anyone think of what a huge, big world it is….and what a small world it is.
Small world, big world, small world….there goes the mind again.
Just before a meal was served on the flight, I looked out the window with the sky just getting light in this part of the planet. Apparently, the land mass I saw below, with lights and then many fishing boats off the shore, was Korea.
My body was a tiny mass of atoms way up above Korea, and yet I had the thought “That’s Korea! WOW! I’m looking at Korea!”
Kind of hilarious that I won’t even land there for a closer look, and still the thoughts appear about that country I’ve heard so much about is right down there, close enough for these eyes to see from thirty thousand feet above in the sky.
Sometimes stressful situations can be seen in the same way. From far above in the sky, just getting a glimpse, not stopping for a visit necessarily.
Recently I was working with a lovely inquirer who said “I really do need to work on my *$%@# much more, my stressful thinking….I’ve been stuck forever on the same upsetting thoughts and feelings about my father….all my life really.”
She had an edge in her voice, a place in her that expected herself to get crackin’ on that ancient relationship and HEAL IT, DANG IT!
It’s troubling if you have a relationship that has affected you very deeply, where when you think of it, something hurts. You may have the same edgey demand for yourself to GET OVER IT…I certainly have had this experience.
So let’s take a look today.
You should get over being stressed out by that person, is it true?
You should think of them with happiness and peace at all times, and no sorrow. You should be able to live in the middle of that stressful memory, or sit with them in a room right now, and enjoy and love them, without issue…..IS IT TRUE?
How do you treat yourself when you think you should be over it, you should feel resolve, peace, happiness or joy when you consider that person?
I know when I had those thoughts that I should be complete, settled, and neutral towards someone that stirred up a lot for me in life, who influenced me deeply in not always such a fun way (to put it mildly) then I feel discouraged…
…I treat myself like I’m not good enough, or going fast enough, or brave enough, or loving enough.
I treat myself like there’s something wrong with me. Sometimes I’ve forced myself to go all the way to Korea, when really, the plane is only flying over it and this particular visit, I’m only taking a tiny glance at it from way up high like a bird.
Who would you be without the thought that you should be anywhere other than where you are?
What if both physically and emotionally, where you are is the best place ever for you, now.
Maybe you don’t have to go anywhere. Maybe where you are is perfect, and there is no need to travel far. Perhaps that is the sweetest, kindest thing you could give yourself.
And when something happens so that you notice it is indeed time to move…time to go all the way to that country…then you will.
I first thought of visiting Bali five years ago. And now, I’m doing it, apparently. Everything in perfect timing, perfect order.
Any sooner would have been too soon, I’m pretty sure this is 100 percent true.
“The Master does his job and then stops. He understands that the universe is forever out of control, and that trying to dominate events goes against the current of the Tao. Because he believes in himself, he doesn’t try to convince others. Because he is content with himself, he doesn’t need others’ approval. Because he accepts himself, the whole world accepts him.”~Tao Te Ching #30
Be gentle and kind and good with yourself (that’s not an order).
You are in the right place in relation to that person who has disturbed you, and the current is running in the way it needs to.
Do The Work, inquire into your thoughts about that person, then rest, and remember that the process of out of our hands.
Much love, Grace