A few days ago in our teleclass “Money, Work and Business” we questioned the belief “I have to do what they say”.
I pretty much believed this since about age five. With school, parents, authority. It is not an uncommon belief.
Even if it’s not that stressful, like you are clearly not being FORCED to do something, one participant still found the thought present as she believed she had to do what the experts say in order to become successful online.
Think about what you think you HAVE to do today in order to get what you want.
- I have to pick up the repaired television
- I have to write out my marketing plan
- I have to work on my curriculum for the new workshop
- I have to spend more time on Facebook
- I have to schedule time for training/learning new things about business
- I have to get more money
- I have to call the dishwasher repair shop
- I have to weed the dandelions out of my yard
- I have to call that person back
I remember writing down the belief “I have to PUSH to be successful”. This could apply in so many areas: training for an athletic event, running your own business, talking to your kids about cleaning their rooms, talking to your kids about their homework, planning a wedding, getting a good deal, meditating every day to reach enlightenment, going to therapy, getting a degree, reading spiritual books, enrolling in programs to change your behavior.
The fourth question in The Work is “who would you be without the thought?” So who would I be without the thought that I HAVE to do it? Anything troubling you’d like to go over first?
Oh no! I might lie down on the grass outside in the sun, like a cat, and do NOTHING!! NADA!! EVER!!!
I need to push myself because otherwise, I’m a no-good, lazy, do-nothing, rude, selfish, unorganized, unsuccessful bump on a log. Achieving nothing. A failure. And I’ll never get anywhere.
Are you sure?
If you were walking along a beautiful pathway, and you saw a person or an animal ahead lying on the ground with a broken leg….would you do nothing?
If you lay down on the couch and decided to stay there until you felt like getting up without the thought that you SHOULD get up….would you stay there forever?
If you noticed that you wanted something, like food, heat, rest, conversation, touch, laughter, money….are you sure that you have to push yourself to receive these things? Could you be OK with the wanting? Could you still be happy?
Maybe being yourself, your own amazing, unique, wonderful self, is all you need to do. No extra pushing required. Just noticing that you do things for the joy of it or because you naturally do it, without thinking.
As Katie says, “drop the maybe“.
Just the other day I received an email from a woman who has been a client for one-on-one sessions and also a participant in one of my teleclasses a year ago. She has been amazingly courageous and continued to question her beliefs about money and her business, and other difficulties in her life in the past.
This kind woman said in her email that she had now joined a group where she was giving 10% of her income to organizations or people who fed her spiritually.
She sent me a donation to continue my writings.
Tears welled up in me in gratitude. Once again, this is an example of the turnaround from when I first started that inquiry five years ago. “I do NOT need to push myself, I need to be easy and gentle with myself.”
“I had no idea that being your authentic self could make me as rich as I’ve become. If I had, I’d have done it a lot earlier.” ~ Oprah Winfrey
With love, Grace