Oh dear.
I got on a roll of planning and creative juices flowing and organizing for two upcoming biggies: Eating Peace Retreat (Jan 19-22) and Eating Peace Process (online immersion for 3 months–everyone who has already done the 3 month course, you’ll be included again as you have lifetime access, if you want to join).
I was feeling full of joy and energy, on how good this will be.
I spent some time taking notes, updating some details. I’m actually in an overview phase of my entire business and actually setting some “goals” (LOL, always a great unknown really).
Then, I emerged from my room into the kitchen-living room and saw it.
That. That. Dreadful Activity.
A computer game underway.
Ew.
What is up with that?
Such a waste of time! So boring! And he’s on his phone playing it! Why would he DO that? No wonder he gets nothing accomplished. Not a take-action person. Never going to achieve much of anything really exciting. Not a role model. Can’t amount to much. Won’t go down in history. No dreams ever getting realized.
Oh! Gosh!
I almost didn’t see you there! What was that you just said? Question my judgments about what I’m seeing, believing, and thinking? You want me to what? The Work of….what?
OH. The Work of Byron Katie!
That’s right.
LOL.
But that’s how fast and tricky the mind runs. At least my own, and I’ve heard others mention the same kind of thing.
Thoughts appear. Believing appears. Feelings appear. Unpleasant ones.
The thoughts and beliefs are sort of irritated. Not peaceful. Not gentle.
What would someone else’s electronic computer game have to do with me?
It seems my mind grabbed it for a moment, and decided it DID have something to do with me.
Is it true, though, that something about what I’m looking at (computer game being played by human I love) means something hard, wrong, difficult, off, troubling?
Am I sure it’s threatening, or depressing?
Haha. No.
Who would I be without the story he shouldn’t play that thing, or it’s better to be someone who is NOT interested in THAT?
I’d be laughing at the goofiness of the mind seeing a future of getting nothing done because of this moment. I’d be stunned by the incredible speed of the mind creating warning signs about life and the dangers of “wasting time” which I’m not even sure is possible.
It’s better not to play games. Achievement = x, y, z. Success means you spend all your time building A, working towards B, creating C.
Who or what would I be without this story? (And I notice this story is just about as repetitive, boring, dull and as wasteful as I think the game is).
I’d really look, without the thought.
I’d see the interesting colors and movements on a screen, and notice I’m only a little interested, and move past it into the kitchen to get water and make dinner.
Life living itself.
I’m not in charge. I’m not the boss.
What a crazed mind, that comes in and wants to take control in less than a flash of a vision using eyes, seeing a phone computer game cross it’s path.
Turning the flash thought around:
Such a fun use of time! So exciting for him! And he’s on his phone playing it! How incredible to be able to DO that! He gets fun, relaxation, joy and delight accomplished. Not a take-action person (what a relief, how restful). Never going to achieve much of anything really exciting (but will achieve so much that’s peaceful, quiet, simple, kind). He’s a role model showing that play is achievable. Play is available. Lovely to amount to less ego, less heaviness, less push, less drive. Won’t go down in history (thank goodness, we like a quiet life).
Dreams getting realized, right there in a chair with only a phone….unlike my mind, which seems to have needed him to be doing some other “approved” activity and being something other than he was.
Turning it around to myself:
Believing my thought in this flash of a vision–what a waste of time! So boring! Why would I DO that? No wonder I get lack-of-peace accomplished. I am not a take-action person, especially when it comes to Not Doing The Work as I walked by, until an hour later.
Never going to achieve much of anything really exciting, called joy, called deep peace, called freedom….unless I question my thoughts. I am not a role model, I’m walking by filled with judgment and criticism. This old story can’t amount to much, doesn’t help me or support me. This won’t go down in history as a new, fresh moment, a new way to see something rather than the same old-same old. My dreams never getting realized.
Wow.
All that in one split second of major judgment, never even spoken aloud.
How could it be brilliant genius that this person I love is showing me this fascinating activity he’s doing, called playing a game on his phone? (And it doesn’t mean I have to play one myself, or LOVE games from now on forever and ever).
In some ways, I don’t know. But it sure is super fun, and makes me laugh out loud, to see it can’t possibly mean anything terrible. It’s not an irritating thing I’m seeing and walking past, on my way from bedroom to kitchen.
It’s a strange, fascinating thing. I’m just here, watching the magic of reality.
I notice, without my stressful story….I ask him about what inspires him about playing, if he enjoys it, if it’s what he truly wants to be doing?
An important conversation is born. A loving, caring one.
“The pain you’re experiencing now is either remembered or anticipated, by the mind. So without remembering or anticipating, how can the pain exist? It’s a memory or a projection….and doing the Judge Your Neighbor worksheet allows you to be so in touch with the moment. As you continue to understand the beautiful mind, the creator of it all, you begin to understand the world that the mind projects….Eventually you can’t name it ‘pain’. It ceases to be true for you. You don’t know if it’s pain or pleasure.” ~ Byron Katie
Much love,
Grace
P.S. Sending details about Eating Peace programs to the Eating Peace mailing list soon. Make sure you’re on that list if you want information about it. Two spots left now for the retreat. Everyone attending receives a follow-up individual session with me for no extra cost. Read more about it here.