I Really Have To Change My Thinking

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Are you thinking you’ll never un-do all your stressful thoughts? Don’t worry, that’s just a thought, too.

Sometimes, when people have been doing self-inquiry a little while, oh OK let’s be honest….a long while….they get a little discouraged about the persistence of thought.

  • I’ll never stop thinking.
  • How could I ever silence all the thoughts that constantly generate in this mind?
  • I’ll be on my death bed questioning my beliefs
  • I haven’t changed enough by now
  • it’s never-ending
  • I quit

Have you noticed how brilliant these ideas are…..for continuing to feel that your situation with thinking is a serious condition?

How do you react when you believe you have to get rid of your thoughts, or that they SHOULD end, or that they’re serious, or that thinking is ruining your life?

I notice one major way people react to this is they feel angry.

With themselves.

Ow.

It must be me and my horrible ego, my powerful brain, my bad thought habits.

I’m anxious, afraid, too many terrible things happened to me. I’m too obsessive.

I’m too addicted to thought. I love stories. I’m terrible. I’m doing it wrong.

I’ll never become enlightened.

(Curtains. Everybody sits in shocked and despairing silence at the terrible end of this movie.)

Well, OK, maybe it’s a little melodramatic, but you know you’ve gone there at some moments, right?

What have you done, to “work” on your thinking?

Books, trainings, mentors, drills, practices, lists, reminders, bells, chimes, workshops.

Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

(I love them all).

But who would you actually be without your stressful beliefs about thoughts themselves?

Who would you be without your rage, or your angst, or your war against your own mind?

Wow.

Not fight my own mind?

“Don’t worry about undoing all of your beliefs. Just investigate the belief that’s causing you stress now. There is never more than one. Undo that one.” ~ Byron Katie in Loving What Is

I mean, I notice there’s a lot going on around here besides my thoughts.

There’s a being here, it seems, looking around, feeling the pulse of being alive, hearing sounds. All in this collective soup of brilliance and wild wonderful activity.

How does all this even happen? I’m just here, a part of it.

  • I’ll always stop thinking.
  • How could I ever keep alive (and loud) all the thoughts that constantly generate in this mind? (I couldn’t if I tried)
  • I will NOT be on my death bed questioning my beliefs (or, I will be–YAHOO that’ll be fun!)
  • I have changed just right by now, and, it’s not really up to me anyway
  • it’s always-ending
  • “I” doesn’t ever quit. Ha ha!
I love all these turnarounds and how sweetly they appear just as true, or truer.
Can I notice that I always stop thinking about something stressful, and how gaps appear between thoughts, and thoughts move from here to there, reappearing and disappearing over again, and I forgot what I was thinking anyway, over and over.
“And what is aware of all this movement? That which never moves. That which you truly are. In the midst of all the movement of life, total stillness.” ~ Jeff Foster
 
It’s OK to think. OK to question. OK to wonder.

 

There’s so much unknown, so much to wonder about, right?

 

It gives the mind a fabulous job to question thoughts, examine, investigate, study, watch, observe, slow down, lighten up.

 

What do you notice right now, in your present moment?

 

See…..you know what it’s like to not have a story already.

 

Nice.
Much Love,

Grace