Cravings can come in the form of many kinds of wanting. As many of you know, one of my favorite portals into a relationship with my deepest self was studying my cravings for food and overeating.
Recently, I re-read one of my own posts from last spring about cravings. I’m including it here today a little modified.
Cravings can come in so many forms….not only food, but other things we ingest, and then also in the form of thinking. Like a huge thirst to KNOW and seek, get, hope-to-find.
The pain enters when we have the thought “I crave it uncontrollably” as many Horrible Food Wonderful Food teleclass participants discovered. They found this to be a very stressful belief. The assumption being, of course, that the craving shouldn’t be there, and that I myself should stop it if it is.
The feeling of craving anything uncontrollably can be extremely painful and desperate. Whether a substance, or a person, or money, or for someone to be with you again who is not longer here.
I’ve thought about craving and all it means many times in my life. Even though I don’t seem to get overwhelming urges or cravings for much in my life I still LOVE to look at the amazing sensation called craving.
Especially when people say it’s UNCONTROLLABLE!!!
Our teleclass group inquire into the concept “I crave it uncontrollably” and I was amazed by the process. As participants answered the simple question “how do you react
when you believe this thought that you crave something uncontrollably?” I noticed once again the way so many of us criticize, condemn, blame, and attack ourselves.
I am the one who craves things uncontrollably, and it’s really terrible. There’s something wrong with me.
Sometimes I still glimpse the feeling of craving, of wanting with a panic, an extremely deep ache. I can imagine something like…“if only my father were still alive” or “if only I had enough money to pay for everyone in my family” or “if only I had more time“….and what these thoughts might be like if they grew. Then it might feel like uncontrollable craving.
Because I found the Work it feels like such a relief to have spent lots of time questioning these things of life that I wish would get satisfied, the things I seem to want.
One of the most amazing experiences is the feeling of being with a craving and studying it, and not acting right away. What color is it? Where does it live? Where did it come from? What is it saying? What am I most afraid of in this moment? What’s the worst that could happen, if I stay here and if I don’t do anything to solve this craving?
OMG, not solve the craving??! But! I will….die!!
Pema Chodron says “Most of us do not take these situations as teachings. We automatically hate them. We run like crazy. We use all kinds of ways to escape — all addictions stem from this moment when we meet our edge and we just can’t stand it. We feel we have to soften it, pad it with something, and we become addicted to whatever it is that seems to ease the pain.”
See if you really are out of control when you have that craving that seems so big.
Who would you be without that thought that you are out of control, that something is wrong with you, that your craving is altogether wrong, or that you shouldn’t have it in the first place?
What if this is a moment where you are meeting your edge. Maybe it has nothing to do with the thing you’re craving. See if you can sit still for 30 seconds. That may be all it takes to make a discovery.
What if nothing is wrong with you, even when you have a craving? What if it’s a voice, saying something, being the energy of craving….and you don’t have to hurt yourself to fulfill it, or even believe that you are unsatisfied right now, or desperate.
“If a country is governed with tolerance, the people are comfortable and honest. If a country is governed with repression, the people are depressed and crafty.”~Tao Te Ching #58
Govern your mind, the place where cravings arise, with tolerance today. Watch yourself feel more comfortable and honest. So much more pleasant than repression. No need for craftiness or depression. Just love.
Much Love,
Grace
P.S. If your craving is for peace around sexuality and all kinds of sexual expression, then come join the teleclass that starts either Oct. 11th or Oct. 12th.