The National Science Foundation several years back estimated that
most humans think around 50 thousand thoughts per day. Many of these
thoughts (you many have noticed) are the opposites of each other.
It’s like riding a SEE-SAW!
“I’d be happier if I was alone”…”I’d be happier if I was with a life-partner
and had a big huge family”…”I’d be happier if I had more room in my
house”…”I’d be happier if I down-sized and got rid of all my stuff”…
“I’d be happier if I quit my job”….”I’d be happier if I got a promotion”…
Back and forth and back and forth….the same ideas, over and over again.
I speak from experience.
And it got really discouraging, sometimes deeply depressing, sometimes
making me want to stay in bed all day. Or smoke, drink, eat, run, spend.
One of my favorite movies of all time is Ground Hog Day. The main
character gets stuck in the same day, over and over and over again.
Just like our thoughts, and moods…Up Down Up Down.
Yesterday I worked with a client who was feeling unhappy about
being so alone in her life. The day before, I worked with a client who
was really tired of her 20 year marriage.
Doing The Work is like jumping off the see-saw.
When it comes to relationships….wow, being able to take just one of
these repeating thoughts, stop the see-saw, and HOLD STILL for a few
minutes, as long as it takes to ask “is it absolutely true?” And then
keep going with each step in The Work.
Doing The Work on being alone and sad….or on that rotten, difficult,
unsatisfying relationship in your life….I have found this stops the
see-saw.
Everything becomes still, peaceful, slow….even hilarious, like in
the movie Ground Hog Day.
If you’re noticing thousands of repeating thoughts about another
person….first of all, you’re normal, since there are 50 thousand
thoughts in only one day.
And, regular normal people, like you and me, can get off the see-saw
ride and stand delighted, full of joy, skipping down the street…at peace
and enjoying your own thinking, enjoying your own life…
like Bill Murray at the end of the movie.
Come along and join the adventure in the upcoming teleclass
‘Turning Relationship Hell Into Heaven” that starts Friday,
Feb. 10th.
Happy Ground Hog Day and See-Sawing in the Playground,
Grace