Tag: nerves

Have you ever had butterflies in your stomach in anticipation of being up on stage or in front of people?

Most of us can remember this kind of buzzing excitement within for the first time when they were just a kid.

Maybe in school, maybe standing up in front of a crowd of peers to speak out, maybe being in an end-of-year dance performance for all the parents.

Yesterday, around an hour before I was to go on stage to present on Eating Peace I felt a flutter of excitement race up my chest, and in my quiet hotel room I opened up the slides on my laptop that I’d be sharing with everyone. I sat still and ran through the talk again mentally, cutting out two slides since I learned I’d have ten minutes less time than expected.

I used to feel crazy nervous when going up on stage.

I will never forget having Bach sheet music opened on my lap, tapping the page silently with my fingers in the green room as the other piano students went out on stage, one after the other, and performed their pieces for recital.

I could hear the applause and picture the students taking a bow. I would count, 3 more to go then me, 2 more to go then me, 1 more to go then me, OK you’re next.

It’s funny how the mind gives a blow-by-blow report like a sportscaster.

Thanks for sharing, brain, I can see what’s happening here without you commenting every step of the way! Jeez!

But there’s something simple and wonderful about rehearsing and going over something you anticipate, when it’s very important.

People plan for emergencies, after all.

We practice.

Even though it never, ever could go the exact way we anticipate.

Even though it’s truly unknown, until it’s over.

And yet, with repetitive practice….

….it’s more likely you’ll feel alive, clear, focused and joyful as you make your presentation.

Even if your hands are shaking, and you feel like volcanic steam is exploding in your torso.

The Convention I’m attending here in Los Angeles is a gathering of Facilitators of The Work, inspiring people who move The Work in the world as teachers, lawyers, business owners, doctors and researchers, and Byron Katie of course, and her husband Stephen Mitchell the beautiful writer and translator.

Some of the attendees are candidates here to graduate from a rigorous program of training in self-inquiry. They’re all making presentations to small groups who evaluate them (I went through this in 2008).

I had the honor of being one of the professional presenters to the whole conference (there were about ten of us).

It’s truly a think-tank kind of scene. Super inspiring.

And yes….adrenaline appears to be present in many awesome people who are making presentations and being evaluated.

What’s one of the best ways to handle nerves?

Why……The Work, of course!

So right now, think of something you feel a little anxious about doing.

If it’s not leading a meeting or being on stage, it may be an honest conversation you need to have with someone in your life, maybe even someone close.

What do you think they might think of you, if you speak it, do it, say it, take action?

Here’s my list of what they could think about me:

• yawn–this is so boring
• nothing she has to say is helpful or applies to me
• she’s blabbing on and on with too many words
• she’s not intelligent
• she’s too soft and gentle in her demeanor–where’s the spunk?
• how about a joke?

Let’s inquire.

When I went on stage, all nervousness just dropped away. I spoke, I clicked my slides, I kept it simple, I ended at basically the exact amount of time allotted.

People lined up to ask for a copy of the slides I used, to say how inspired they were, to say how much they learned, to say how connected they felt to me now that they knew more of my personal story of recovering from an eating disorder.

One woman had tears and the sweetest eyes, sharing some of her difficult journey with addiction. I gave her such a long hug. My heart was bursting.

All I know is I love recovery, healing, and clarity.

All I could do was to share what it looks like in me.

As it turned out, that was enough.