question wishing and find yourself now
Longing.
I wish…..
If only…..
The floating images through the mind that dream, sometimes with great angst, of a different future.
We’ve all been there.
- I wish I had a soul mate
- I wish I was back with that Other life partner
- I wish I had a million dollars
- I wish I could lose weight
- I wish I had a nice place to live
- I wish I could win
- I wish I could create that awesome thing (book, song, movie, Ted Talk, organization, law, new world order)
I love looking more deeply at wishes.
The passion of desire, especially the kind where you can’t help yourself, you just keep pursuing it…..
…..can be a Great Adventure.
And yes, sometimes quite infuriating and disappointing.
But what if you stopped, and considered what you really want that thing, that event, that experience, that person…..for?
What would it give you, if you had it?
For example, a million bucks.
What would I have, if I had a million dollars.
OK, here’s something hilarious that just happened–my mind immediately said make it 10 million and now we’re talking.
So, let’s multiply it by ten.
What would I have?
Wow Wee, I would have security, freedom, independence, fun, adventure, excitement. I would be able to give generously. I’d feel completely secure for life. I’d feel genius about taking care of my kids and offering the best possible opportunities.
I would finally be able to be fully creative and figure out the best most genius program ever for helping people end compulsive or addictive or dependent trances…..food or otherwise.
Honestly?
I’d probably move into a bigger house and get a nicer car that’s not about to break down. And new hard wood floors….in the current house. Which I’d keep.
Sigh.
My lifestyle is so much lower than when I grew up.
Fume.
Notice the comparison that happens, when I believe I want that other thing (visions of the past, or images from movies, magazines, friends, family, neighbors).
Over there it looks like THAT. (Lots of good, sparkly stuff).
Over here it looks like THIS. (Lots of run down, old, ugly stuff).
Wait.
Did she say something about ending “dependent trances”?
Hmmmmm. Right.
Let’s keep going.
Who would you be without the belief that ten million dollars would offer safety, fun, independence….and that I don’t already have contact with all of those things?
Am I safe? Check. Having fun? Check. Independent? Very. Enjoying myself? Weeee! Adventure? Amazing.
And the thing is….
….if I didn’t feel any of these things a whole lot, or I wanted to feel them more….
….I could turn the volume up on the sensations, and find examples of how true they are, and bask in them RIGHT NOW.
In the Work of Byron Katie we speak of “living turnarounds”.
The way to live the opposite of your stressful thinking, and celebrate peaceful, joyful thinking instead.
What would it look like?
What would you do, if you lived it?
What would it feel like, if you felt it?
Now that’s a fun exercise.
And I don’t have to wish, or wait, to enjoy what I really wanted to enjoy in the first place.
Awesome.
Much love, Grace
P.S. If you want to enter the feeling of being someone who lives with Eating Peace….only two weeks from today we’ll be practicing and feeling it for three full days in Seattle. It can stop the discouraged pattern of overeating, comfort eating, boredom eating…and allow you to enter what it’s like to feel peace instead. Hit reply with questions about signing up.